Page 6 of Silver Tears

We arrive at Charlie’s school, and I tell Ryan I’ll be five minutes. He mutters something under his breath about missing the gym for this. I leave him to his moaning and head into the school. I wait at the reception whilst they fetch him. Charlie’s face lights up when the teacher brings him through to me.

“Milly!” He wraps his arms around my middle and hugs me tightly. “You came.”

“Of course, I did,” I assure him, collecting his coat off the teacher. “So sorry about this. I realised after you called me, I’d had a voicemail from our mum asking me to pick him up. I apologise if you’ve had to delay getting home.” It is a blatant lie.

“It’s fine,” the teacher says. “Charlie has been no trouble, and he’s coloured some pictures in for you to hang up at home.”

“Great, well come on, Charlie. Let’s get you home.” I usher him out of school and over to Ryan’s car. Opening the back passenger door, I get him settled in and put his seatbelt on.

“Who’s he?” Charlie asks me, studying Ryan, who taps the steering wheel and looks at his watch.

“This is my boyfriend, Ryan. He gave me a lift.”

Ryan looks over his shoulder at Charlie. “Hey kid.”

Charlie nods his head, not looking too sure. “Mums got a new boyfriend. I don’t like him. He shouts.”

This is news to me. I shut his door and climb into the front of the car, placing my hand on Ryan’s leg. “Thanks for doing this.”

He nods, frowning as he pulls away and I give him directions to my mum’s house. It surprises me when he doesn’t ask questions about who Charlie is to me or where he’s taking us. We pull up outside the house and Ryan looks at his watch. “You’ve got five minutes.”

“Five minutes?” I repeat as I undo Charlie’s belt and help him out of the car. “Ryan, I can’t leave him here alone. I don’t even know if his mum is at home.”

He rolls his eyes and taps the steering wheel. “That isn’t my problem, babe. Five minutes and I’m leaving. With or without you.”

My fists clench at my side. He can be a real arsehole sometimes. “Fine. Go. Thanks for the lift.”

“Sure. Oh, and Mills. My parents are out on Wednesday evening. We’ll have the house to ourselves.” He winks at me, and I know what he’s insinuating.

“But I have an English test on Thursday I need to study for.”

He shakes his head, frowning again. “Like you need to study, Miss Brainiac. I’ll pick you up at six. Oh, and Milly, wear something lacy.”

I flush red, nodding, as I usher Charlie away from the car, hoping he doesn’t ask questions about that conversation. I pull the spare key out of my bag and unlock the front door.

“Mum!” I shout into the house as I help Charlie out of his coat and hang it in the hallway. “Mum, are you home?”

No answer. “Go pop the tv on, Charlie. I’ll make a start on tea. What would you like?”

Charlie throws his shoes off by the door. “Beans and waffles, please.”

“I’m sure I can manage that for you. Go on, go watch tv.” Once I can see he’s settled in front of the telly. I do a quick scan of the house. The place is a mess. There are wet towels on the bathroom floor. The kitchen has a sink full of dishes and the rubbish bin is overflowing. I rifle through the freezer and find two waffles left in a box. There are no beans, but I find some eggs and decide to do him fried eggs and waffles. The fridge and freezer are lacking supplies. Whilst his potato waffles are in the oven, I fill the washing-up bowl and wash the pile of dirty dishes. I say a little prayer when I find some bleach under the kitchen sink and head upstairs and give the bath and sink a quick wipe over before I collect up the dirty towels. I bob my head in Charlie’s room and curse when I see his bed is unmade. There are dirty clothes strewn across the floor. Collecting them up, I head back downstairs and load the washing machine up. There’s no washing detergent, so washing up liquid will have to do. Once the house looks tidy, I plate out Charlie’s tea and shout him into the kitchen.

“Sit down, Charlie Chops,” I tell him, pulling out a dining chair for him. “Did mum say she had to go somewhere when she took you to school this morning?”

Charlie shakes his head as he tucks into his food. “No. She said she had a bad head, and she was grumpy this morning.”

I nod my head. No doubt the empty beer cans at the side of her bed are to blame for her bad head this morning. I sit down opposite my little brother and watch him eat. I love this little guy so much. He is my secret. If my dad or my brothers knew I was in touch with mum, they would hit the roof. Mum left us when I was only six. I don’t remember her much, merely a few grainy memories. She’d had an affair with one of my dad’s best friends and packed her bags and left with him. No goodbye. No, sorry. She just left us all. A year ago, she messaged me on snapchat. To say it shocked me was an understatement. It has been hard growing up without a mum. All my aunties and my grandma assured us they were there for us all, but growing up without a mum wasn’t easy. I used to be so jealous of the other kids when their mums collected them from school. I agreed to meet her, and we met up at a cafe here in Droyton. I’d lied to my dad and brothers and said I was going to Ruby’s for tea. Meeting her for the first time after all these years was a strange experience. I could see myself in her. We had the same dirty blonde hair, and she had the same sprinkling of freckles on her cheeks, like me. I was even more surprised when I got there to find she wasn’t alone. A cute, mousey brown-haired boy sat beside her. When she told me he was my little brother, I was at a loss for words. Charlie had grinned at me, with a front tooth missing. He’d told me he’d never had a sister before and was glad I was his. From that moment on I’d carried on seeing them both in secret. Dad would not be happy if he found out. Whenever mum’s name came up in the house, a dark cloud came over him. Damon told me that her leaving him and cheating on him with his best friend had undoubtedly hurt him. I am my dad’s perfect little girl. I adored my father and did everything I could to be the best daughter. I always got good grades, and I studied hard and did everything I could to make him proud of me.

“You hungry?” I ask Chops with a chuckle as he devours the food on his plate at record speed.

He licks his lips and looks expectantly at me. “Do we have ice cream?”

I get up and have a look in the freezer. “Afraid not, chops. I tell you what. Shall we walk to the shop and get some?”

His eyes light up. “Yes, please. Can we get mint choc chip?”

I nod my head, a boy after my heart. “Go get your shoes on and grab your coat.” He races off like his pants are on fire. If there’s one way to Charlie’s heart, it’s ice cream.

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