Page 22 of Grand Love

“I can’t.” I shake my head, panicking. I don’t want to move, this position works.

“Come on, love, you can do it,” Maggie whispers, kissing the side of my head.

I look at her and nod, letting her take my hand as I step up and lie myself down on the bed.

“This will be uncomfortable, Nina. I’m sorry, my lovely,” Kelly tells me from the end of the hospital bed.

“Not long now,” Maggie says, stroking my hair back from my face.

My stomach starts to ache and I know another contraction is only moments away. “Oh god! I have a contraction.”

“Don’t panic, you’ve done so well, Nina. Deep breath in… Out.”

I manage the breath in but lose it mid-exhale. “I can’t!” I shout. “Ahhhhhh! Fuck, no!”

“Would you prefer to be on your knees, Nina?”

“I don’t know!”

“Just keep breathing and I will get you checked as soon as this one passes.”

“I need to push. Please, Maggie, I can’t.” I turn into her, searching for comfort.

“I know, darling,” she cries.

“Is that one subsiding, Nina?”

I breathe deeply as the last of the contraction racks through me, and my body slowly sinks into the bed as I relax. I can’t take much more; this is killing me.

Kelly begins examining me and I wince as she stretches me. “Nina, you are seven centimetres we aren’t quite there—”

“No!” I panic, throwing myself forward and standing from the bed in a rush. “I need to push.” My stomach starts to contract instantly, and I bear down, my body telling me I need to push. “Uggghhhhh!” A rush of warm liquid rushes down my legs. “Uh uh uh—”

“Don’t panic, it’s just your waters. Do you feel like you need to push, Nina?”

“Yes! Ugghhhhh!” I scream as the pain intensifies.

“Nina, I need to get Mason.” Maggie panics.

“Ugghhhhhhhhh. No! Not yet.” I’m not ready. It’s been five months, but I still can’t bear to face him.

I start to pant as I lean back down on the bed on my forearms—the most comfortable position I’ve found in the seven hours we’ve been here. The contraction starts to subside again, and I stand, my body wet with sweat.

“I need you on the bed, Nina. You aren’t steady enough on your feet.”

“I’m fine,” I pant. “I’m fine.”

“Try and get on the bed, darling, please,” Maggie pleads, her voice thick with emotion.

“I’m… Oh, no! No, no!”

“Nina, you’re panicking, you need to breathe.”

I shake my head as my body tenses all over and the pain takes me completely, taking control of my ability to do anything but focus on it. “Ugggggghhhhhhhhh!” I make a feral sound that ripples from deep in my throat.

“I need her on the bed now!” Kelly calls out.

Maggie strokes my hair and uses a damp flannel to blot my forehead. “Nina, we need you on the bed now. Please, try for me,” her worried voice coos.

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