Page 21 of Redemption

“Baby-”

“I’ve lost sight of who I am. I don’t even recognize the woman staring back at me in the mirror anymore. The only reason you’re so upset with my decision is because I gave up just like you did. The difference is you just never fought, Colt. I did, and I’m so tired. I’m so fucking tired, and there’s nothing left to fight for.”

Swallowing, he reaches for her, but she steps out of his grasp. “I love you.”

“I wish I could believe you.”

Colt watches his wife walk to her car, and he can’t decide if he should follow her or not. All the anger and frustration he had lingers below the surface, but now he’s also scared. Really scared. He can see he pushed her to the edge, and she just jumped.

Turning towards the clubhouse, Melanie and Felicity shake their heads and walk inside, letting the door slam in his face. He guesses he deserves it. Her words replay in his head, and he can’t help but wonder where she would’ve ever gotten the idea that she needs plastic surgery.

Because you royally fucked up. Fucking Noah.

He really did, didn’t he? Jesus, I died for this.Great, he has two dead people in his head. Maybe he needs a fucking straightjacket.

“Shut the fuck up,” he growls and walks into the clubhouse.

VP storms over to him. “Where the fuck is she?”

“She left.”

“Be honest with me. Is there even a chance Ian’s step-grandchild is yours?”

“No!” he shouts. “I never fucked her!”

Ky sighs. “Are you sure? Because when I talked to Psycho, he said you’ve been downing vodka like water. Is there even a possibility something happened you don’t quite remember?”

Shep walks up to him. “You don’t do smart things sober, but you do even dumber shit drunk. How can you be sure you didn’t cheat on Lex?”

The anger radiates off him, and Colt understands. Shep was one of the many strays his wife took in, and they have a weird friendship because of it. “Because the only time I was drunk enough where I don’t remember the night would have produced a child by now. I remember every other night.”

Up until this point, his anger never wavered from Lex. But seeing her the way she looked tonight, his anger turned around and points right back at him, too. He contributed to everything, but she’s not giving him a fair chance.

Sure, she was right. He cut communication a bit when he went to Black Valley, but it’s not for the reasons she thinks. It really pisses him off how everyone believes he’d mess around on her.

“Colt, there are a lot of people in this room ready to murder you right now. And I’d be lying if I said the woman who knows probably the most about us will no longer have legal rights to avoid testifying against us if ever called upon didn’t worry me. It might be best to leave and let us all cool down,” Jennings says.

“I honestly thought that if I could get her to just talk to me, we’d work it out,” he says.

Melanie shakes her head. “From the sounds of it, she tried to talk to you and work it out long before this. And you turned her down every time.”

“How could you do that to her?” Felicity asks, wiping her eyes. “She said she begged you to stay for a fucking weekend. On her knees. Crying. And you just left? Do you have any idea how that had to have made her feel?”

Ky reaches out, and she slaps his hand away. “Felicity-”

“No, you picked a side. The wrong side. After everything she’s done for you, for all of us, you still thought Colt wasn’t bullheaded and giving you his stupid version of what actually happened?”

“You humiliated her with what you did tonight,” Zane says. “Your intentions weren’t good. If they were, you would’ve taken her out of the main room and talked to her in private. Let her keep some of her dignity.”

Shep shakes his head. “You just pushed someone we’ve all come to depend on for things both in and outside of the club running for the hills. If her own brother who treated her like shit for half her life tells you that you fucked up, you really fucked up.”

Zane scoffs. “Gee, thanks.”

“He’s not wrong,” VP says to his son before looking back at Colt. “I don’t know what’s going on with you, but you need to figure your shit out. That girl has never been so devastated in her life, and now I’ve seen it twice. Both times because of you. And I hate you for it, I really fucking hate you.”

“We all do,” Shep says.

“But I hate me, too. She asked me for help, and I didn’t do anything.”

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