Page 95 of Redemption

Chapter 33

Griffin’s Beach

Lex

Staring after her husband, Lex’s heart races. Why can’t he just admit he was wrong? That he made mistakes? If he just accepted some fault in what happened, accepted fault for the constant chipping away of their relationship, and finally tell her what’s eating at him to let her back in, maybe they could move forward. But damn him for messing with her head.

Pulling out her phone, she pauses briefly and scrolls past Colt’s name to click on Daniel’s.

LEX:Hey something came up and I can’t meet. I’m sorry

DANIEL:No problem. Rain check?

LEX:I’ll call you

Shutting the door, the tears fall down her cheeks as she unzips her dress and slides it down her body. One visit from Colt and she cancels plans to slip into her sweatpants and a baggy shirt. Colt’s shirt. When he stayed the night of Shep’s wedding, she made sure to hide that she took a couple of his shirts with her. It gives her a little bit of comfort but also breaks her heart.

Her hands shake while she takes off her makeup. Crying makes it more difficult thanks to the damn waterproof mascara and eyeliner she used.

Once it’s all removed, she stands and stares at the person in the mirror she barely recognizes. This isn’t who she wanted to be, so how the hell did she get here? Oh, right. Her husband didn’t want her until he couldn’t have her anymore.

“Lex?” Grayson calls from the doorway. “Are you home?”

Wiping her eyes, she walks into the kitchen to find him standing there. “Well, just walk right in.”

“The door was unlocked, so I got kind of worried. After everything that’s happened, I think I’m entitled to worry about you.”

“I’m fine,” she lies.

“Is someone here?” he asks, his hand moving to the belt that no longer holds his standard issue pistol from the department. The way his face scrunches tells her the anger hasn’t subsided. Not that she blames him.

The reason they fired him makes her angry enough to contemplate going down there and giving Travis and Julian a piece of her mind. It would make her feel better, but it wouldn’t help Grayson as much as hurt him.

“No, I’m alone. I’m always alone when the kids are gone,” she says and moves into the living room, slumps down on the couch, and covers herself with a blanket.

“What’s wrong?” He follows her and sits next to her, his eyes wide with concern.

Shaking her head, she smiles. “The same thing that’s always wrong these days.”

“Colt?”

“He won’t let me go,” she whispers.

“Because he’s not stupid. Well, clearly he’s an idiot, but notthatstupid. He did fuck around and lose you, but he’ll hold onto you until the day he dies. We all know that, and so do you.”

Resting her head on the back of the couch, hot tears fall and pool in her ears. “I wish he’d just let me move on. He made these decisions for me. He pushed me to them, and now he’s acting like I’m out to hurt him. Like I’m doing everything in my power to punish him.”

“It feels like a punishment for him. A punishment he’s earned, but I’ve seen him lately. He seems different. Even from the version of him I saw when things were good with you two.”

“Can you keep a secret?”

He chuckles. “You know I can.”

“I don’t want to move on. It’s the last thing in the world I want. I have to, but I want him to prove himself. To show me things are different and will continue to stay different. It’ll never happen until he faces his demons, and that won’t happen until he realizes and accepts what happened,” she says.

“I get that. But if you’re not willing to give him a chance to make things right with you, maybe you have to fully leave. Divorce him and make it official.”

Sighing, she closes her eyes. “As much as I hate the club right now, I can’t do that to them. My family is in that club.”

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