Page 15 of Paved in Hate

“You got a lot done in less than a day,” I tell him, trying to keep the tremor out of my voice.

“Money and the right motivation can get most anything done,” he says, and I’m guessing a lot of threats were made to make this special occasion happen. Before he leads me out, he rests his hand on top of mine, but there’s nothing comforting about it. “Even though you’re becoming a Melnikov today, your loyalty will always be to me. Do you understand that? Our family comes first. Always.”

“I understand,” I whisper, feeling the heat of his skin against mine like the warning it is.

“I’d hate to have to hurt someone else to remind you of your duty to this family,” he warns. “Do you want more blood on your tainted hands, Katya?”

“No, please don’t hurt anyone,” I quickly say, thinking about Oksana and his dark-haired pet and the young maid with the bruised neck. “I’m loyal to you, Konstantin.”

He gives my hand a squeeze that’s not at all comforting or reassuring. “Good. Just make sure you don’t forget it, or I will remind you in a very bloody way.”

“I won’t forget.”

By the time we start walking, I’m using all my willpower to not pass out or get sick. I can barely breathe as we walk out onto the veranda and the music starts up. Everything’s a blur thanks to my anxiety and the too-thick veil. We walk down the aisle that’s been formed between the two large groups of chairs, all of them filled with Bratva members. Near the front, I spot Osip on one side, and when I look to the other, I catch a quick glimpse of three couples before Konstantin stops in front of the officiant.

I avoid looking at the man in front of me, the stranger who I’m about to marry, and instead turn to Konstantin when he leans in to kiss my veiled cheek. From the outside, it looks downright sweet, but no one else hears him when he whispers, “Don’t fuck this up,” in my ear before stepping back and guiding me to stand near Oksana and in front of the man he’s giving me to.

Daring to look up, I see a fuzzy glimpse of a man in a dark tux and another man standing behind him. The veil makes it hard to see details, but I see enough to know he’s not old. It looks like I won’t be marrying someone old enough to be my grandpa after all. Small mercies, I guess.

The officiant starts, and the next several minutes are nothing but a mix of my heart beating so fast I feel it in every part of my body and my lungs screaming for air, because no matter how hard I try to calm down, I still feel like I’m suffocating.

Thankfully, the officiant has obviously been told to make this wedding ceremony the short and sweet kind. There’s no exchanging of vows where we promise to love and cherish one another. It’s a simple declaration ofwith this ring I thee wed,and before I know it, rough hands are holding mine and slipping a ring on my finger while I say, “I do.”

Oksana hands me a thicker wedding band that someone must’ve picked out earlier, and when I hold his hand in mine, I’m surprised by how rough the palm is. It doesn’t feel like callouses. It feels like scars, and I can’t help but wonder what they’re from. I slip the ring on his finger, hearing his voice for the first time when he says, “I do.” It’s deep, and since the ceremony is in English, I can hear the Russian accent.

He pulls his hand away as soon as the ring is on his finger, like he can’t tolerate touching me for one second longer, and when the man next to us says, “You may now kiss your bride,” I’ve never been so scared in my entire life. My new husband steps closer and grips the bottom of my veil, slowly raising it over my head, and when I see his face clearly for the first time, I’m stunned. He’s breathtaking—almond-shaped, whiskey-colored eyes, dark hair with a freshly shaved face that’s showing off one hell of a chiseled jaw, and a full set of lips that are currently not even hinting at a smile. It seems the monster I’ve married is a beautiful one. That at least I’m familiar with.

His eyes meet mine right before he leans in, and when my body instinctively stiffens, his eyes narrow as he tilts his head the tiniest bit so his lips land right at the corner of my mouth instead of on it. Stepping back, he quickly looks away from me and back at the man standing behind him. The man’s dark eyes meet mine, and he gives me a faint hint of a smile before Konstantin is laughing and shaking Vitaly’s hand as he uses his other hand to smack him on the back.

“Welcome to the family,” Konstantin tells him.

Vitaly smiles and turns his full attention to my brother. I might as well not even be here. This is obviously a marriage between these two. Oksana gives me a quick hug, whispering a “Good luck” before she steps away, waiting for Konstantin to tell her what to do. Sometimes he likes her by his side, and other times he doesn’t want to even see her. When he reaches out a hand for her, she gives a soft sigh that only I can hear before taking his hand and pasting a smile on her face.

I stand slightly behind them in my wedding dress, feeling like an idiot as the weight of my ring hangs heavy on my finger. Glancing down, I look at it for the first time. It’s actually really pretty, and I’m surprised by that. I don’t know who picked it out, but the delicate platinum band is covered in a line of pink and white diamonds. It’s feminine and beautiful and exactly what I would’ve picked out for myself.

I’m still looking at it when I hear a woman’s voice say my name. Looking up, I see three women standing in front of me. One is obviously pregnant, the other looks like she’s not too far behind her, and the third isn’t showing yet if she is expecting. They’re smiling at me, and it’s the first genuine smile I’ve seen all day.

“Hi, I’m Emily,” the obviously pregnant one says, stepping closer and wrapping me in a big hug. “It’s so nice to meet you.”

“I’m Simona,” the other woman says, giving me the next hug, and the last woman pulls me in and says, “I’m Jolene. Vitaly’s our brother-in-law.”

“Oh,” I manage to say, looking back at the men who must be my husband’s brothers. They don’t look like they’re related, but they’re all handsome and wearing their tuxes like there’s nothing but pure muscle underneath. The one with a lip and eyebrow piercing looks up and winks at Jolene, and I’m so stunned by the affectionate look he’s giving her that all I can do is stare. When I glance over at Jolene, she’s giving him a big smile, and there’s not even a hint of fear in her eyes. They can’t possibly be ignorant of what their husbands do. Hell, I can see the goddamn viper ouroboros tattoo on two of their wrists. Is it possible that they’re okay with what their husbands do?

Feeling sicker by the second, I make up an excuse about needing to use the bathroom and then speed walk my ass inside, avoiding the crowd of Bratva men and the staff that’s busy setting up the meal that I’m going to be expected to sit through. I was really hoping we’d just say our vows and be done, but my brother apparently wants to make this look like it wasn’t just agreed on yesterday.

I escape into the bathroom near the stairs and lock the door behind me. Bracing my hands against the counter, I face my reflection and force myself to take long, slow breaths. I look like a woman who’s about to lose her shit. My eyes are too wide and a bit frantic, my face dangerously pale, and I’m shaking so badly I can see the sides of my veil vibrate. I can’t do this. I can’t fake this, and Konstantin will murder me if I embarrass him. Tears threaten to fall, but I fight it with everything I have.

My heart hammers in my chest when I hear a soft knock at the door. “Just a sec,” I say, hoping whoever it is didn’t hear how shaky my words sound. I take in another deep breath and then straighten my shoulders and force myself to unlock the door. The last person I expect to see is my brand-new husband staring down at me. Even with my tall heels, I still have to look up to see him. His amber eyes study me. They aren’t cold like my brother’s, but I wouldn’t go so far as to say they’re warm either. Hesitant is probably the best description. His jaw tightens when I can’t stop my eyes from watering again, but I manage to hold back the tears. I can cry myself to sleep later after he’s done god knows what to my body.

My breath catches in my throat when I hear Konstantin’s voice. He’s yelling at someone for not being fast enough with the tray of appetizers. Vitaly watches me, and I swear he notices every damn detail. I’m used to my brother’s invasive gaze, but Vitaly makes me feel naked before him, like he sees every damn thing I’m trying to hide. Without a word, he puts a hand on my waist and very gently pushes me back into the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

“What are you doing?” I ask, looking around and hoping like hell he’s not expecting an after-wedding quickie in the goddamn bathroom. I’m not holding onto some fairytale deflowering fantasy, but I sure as shit don’t want to lose my virginity in the bathroom with my brothers right outside the door and a houseful of guests.

“You look like you could use a breather,” he says, following my lead and speaking English.

When he realizes his hand is still gripping my hip, he quickly pulls it back and runs it through his dark hair with a sigh.

“I know this is awkward,” he says, lifting a brow when I huff out a breath of air because that’s one hell of an understatement. “But I need you to know that I’m not going to hurt you.”

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