Page 98 of A Dark and Lovely Devastation

Home. My home.

“All this to get me to leave?” I rasped, flinching as each word left my mouth.

The witch waved a hand, this time dismissively. “This is my bog. I do not share, but neither shall I send you, who has born the sisters all these years, who has saved us from their wrath, to your death. It is up to you to decide what you shall do.”

“If I stay, if I try to stop them, is death certain?”

“It is unclear,” the bog witch said. “Perhaps you shall die. Perhaps you shall save our world. Only you can bring your sisters into subjugation, even now.”

“I can’t.”

Just because death wasn’t certain didn’t mean I could succeed against my sisters. They were powerful, and I was… I had a faerie guardian that I still couldn’t access. I had nothing. That wouldn’t have stopped Mina from trying to do the right thing. Or Dagda. It hadn’t stopped Thaya. They were noble and valiant. They would give their life for even a chance to save those around them.

I wasn’t a hero.

I always knew that. I wasn’t the person that sacrificed for others. I never intentionally placed myself in danger. But I never thought myself a villain, either.

Until today.

The ripples in the pond lapped against my calves. My feet sank deeper into the squelching clay. Despite the mugginess and insects buzzing around my head, shivers rolled over my body.

Like I’d seen all those weeks ago, thick globs of mud dangled from the bog witch’s matted hair. Dripping down at the same rate. A smile split her face, revealing huge gaps among rotting teeth. “Make your choice, dear.”

I stared at the shimmering archway in front of me. The magic pulsed through my veins.

Self-preservation was a strong instinct. Stronger in some than in others. It didn’t matter that I caused the approaching death and destruction. It didn’t matter that only I might stop it.

In the end, it was always the same.

I wanted to live.

And only one choice made that a guarantee. A choice I’d known I would make all along. I lifted my feet from the festering mud and pulled myself up onto the root of the tree, free of the bog’s depths. I drew in a shuddering breath, then stepped into the shimmering archway, passing through the portal.

I left the Otherworld to war and ruin.

Chapter 34

The air was chilled.

The glimmering portal shut and disappeared into nothing. I was back in the human world. For good.

The relief I wanted to feel never came.

I rubbed my arms and stared out over the glassy pond. The twilight glared off of the familiar calm waters. I swallowed past the ache in my throat and moved up onto the trail, through the park. I was haunted by the old playset and the bench where Dagda sat that first night.

My palm slid over the cool metal and trembled. I gazed up into the sky, though the sun was still setting, thinking of the stars.

Diarmuid and Grainne. All of Dagda’s love stories had ended in despair, as if he knew what we were to ultimately become. What all love stories always became in the end.

I clenched my jaw. There was one thing I could do. One last thing to combat Badb and Macha… and to protect Dagda.

It took fifteen minutes to walk to my house. The wall blocked most of the lower story, but the guards were gone, giving the outside a deserted feeling. They hadn’t even bothered to replace the front gate that Dagda’s faerie guardian had torn to the ground, leaving the driveway wide open. I was home. My chest tightened.

I walked up the front drive onto the porch and knocked. The door swung open. Nellie stood there, looking as normal as ever. Her eyes grew wide.

“Chels?”

I gave her an awkward smile. “Hey, Nellie.” The words croaked out of me, reminding me that Badb had barely choked me.

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