Page 8 of I Saw Krampus Kissing Ms Claus

“You don’t know what I wanted.” I punctuate my sentence with a crack of the reins.

“I knew what you didn’t want.” He sighs, he’s staring at his hands now, like looking at me is hard. “I’m Krampus. I see people’s auras. I know when they feel guilty, or angry, or lustful, or covetous, or gluttonous.”

“What does that have to do with anything?” I ask.

“You weren’t thinking about any of that. You didn’t have a single lustful thought in your aura that night. When you looked at me the same way you always did.” His voice is sad. “With your aura all soft pink with faded edges.”

I pause to consider it. I’ve run the horribly embarrassing moment through my brain over and over. Christmas Eve, we were celebrating Kris’s and Vikram’s first successful trip across the universe. We all partied late into the night. Fruitcake, mulled wine, figgy pudding, carol singing. One of the most memorable evenings of my life. I wasn’t just drunk on eggnog. I was intoxicated by the dancing and the light brushes of Krampus’s flirtatious touches. And I cornered him. Or he cornered me.

Being caged by his arms against the wall is the part that is seared into my brain.

The heat of his hand in mine. The adorable way that he smiled as he hovered over me. The surprise that lit his eyes when I nervously pointed to the mistletoe above us. The way that the bourbon and eggnog churned in my stomach when he leaned forward. The overwhelming embarrassment when his lips detoured and met my cheek. Pressing a chaste little kiss there before he pulled away from me looking sheepish.

I’ve spent years combing over every minute detail. He’s right. I wasn’t thinking about sex. I was so excited to just be there, in front of him, finally about to get my own secret Christmas wish, the thing I could never ask someone to bring to me. I was going to learn how Krampus really felt about me.

“Lords-a-leaping!” I yell, flicking him in the arm. “Just because I wasn’t thinking about fucking you didn’t mean I didn’t want you to kiss me.”

“What?” Krampus seems genuinely confused.

“You thought I didn’t like you, because I wasn’t thinking about fucking you when we stood under some mistletoe?” I blurt out.

“Yes!”

“Of course I wanted to kiss you!”

“You did?” He grumbles. “How was I supposed to figure that out?”

“Are you out here only kissing people who are thinking about fucking you?”

“It’s been pretty foolproof so far.” He has the decency to look chagrined, but it doesn’t stop me from thinking about being underneath him, his furry body pressed against mine.

“I just wanted to kiss you! That’s not a naughty thought is it?” I say, shoving every other thought out of my brain.

“Not as naughty as what you’re thinking about now.” He says with a lascivious grin.

“I’m thinking about dumping you out of this sleigh!”

He tosses back his head and laughs. “I fucked everything up then didn’t I?”

“Yes. I guess you messed up.” I squirm in my seat before admitting. “But, I could have handled it better. I thought you were just using me to make yourself feel good.”

He’s sitting more relaxed now, his arm moves to the back of the sleigh.

“You always made me feel good. You made me feel seen, and understood, and happy” He leans just a little closer to me to be sure his quiet words can reach my ears. “It might not change anything Nikki. But, I’m sorry.”

I bite the inside of my lip to keep my words inside.

“I’m sorry if you thought I didn’t care about you. I’m sorry if you thought I was just using you. Nothing could be further from the truth.”

I jerk a nod, accepting the apology as truth, but not quite trusting myself to speak.

“I thought you hung the moon, Nikki. I still think that you are absolutely amazing. Intelligent. Gorgeous. Fun. All of it—”

“What do you say we let the boys do what they do best?” I say when his compliments start to make me squirm.

Krampus puts a hand on the dashboard in front of him, bracing himself. I take that as my cue.

“On Prancer! On Comet! Dash away! Dash away!” I call into the cold air.

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