Page 25 of A Magical Christmas

I curled into his chest and sobbed. “That was amazing. Nicky.” And I let myself cry my heart out, because truthfully, I’d never been happier. We had a real and undeniable connection and chemistry. And that was terrifying. Because anytime I had ever experienced even the slightest glimmer of hope in my life, it was soon lost. And the mere thought of losing Nicky caused my heart to hammer with an instant and insurmountable fear.

Losing him was now my worst nightmare.

Chapter 11.

Nicky.

IHELD JAYDY WHILEshe cried, her words and actions not quite in harmony with one another, but then women were a mystery sometimes.Could these be happy tears?I wondered. They didn’t really sound like it.

“I’m just going to use the bathroom,” Jaydy whispered, her throat a little hoarse as she pushed up from my chest to head over to the adjacent ensuite.

I pulled myself up and watched her go, unsure if I should go after her or not. But when she shut the ensuite door, the choice was taken from me, and so I simply adjusted the blankets and sat there in bed.

How long was an appropriate amount of time to wait for her? She had me a little worried if I was being honest. Though, the crying didn’t continue, which was somewhat encouraging. Then the water turned on.

Perhaps she was just overwhelmed by how intense our session had been? I was feeling something similar too. I’d always known that sex would be different with the woman who was meant just for me, but that session was something else. It had blown my fucking mind.

In the past sex had been enjoyable, but it was never anything more than a purely physical experience. It made me feel great, the way a good training session did; like a solid run with the bonus of touch and affection. But the idea of speaking to those women, or trying to create a deeper connection, wasn’t pleasant. In fact, it was intolerable, nigh on unbearable.

Any attempt at going past the physical with them only emphasized the fact that there was no hope for the future. There was always a severe lack of compatibility. We were strangers relieving each other’s libido and that’s it. It was fun while it lasted, but I always left feeling sick to my stomach and hollow afterward—like something was missing. Something important that I couldn’t quite put my finger on.

With Jaydy, there was a totally different array of emotions I felt after making love to her. I wasn’t counting down the minutes and rushing off to shower, or wishing I was elsewhere while they slept on me—coyote ugly style.

I wanted her stay wrapped up in my arms so that I could protect her. I wanted her to talk to me, to tell me about her life and snatch as many precious moments as I could with her; the kind of moments where we were just together and at peace...content in the company that fate had chosen for us.

Even with her running off to the bathroom crying, I didn’t feel the need to join her. I was relaxed with her, somehow. I’d never felt anything like it before.

When the door opened and a naked, red-faced Jaydy rushed back in, I threw back the covers for her without a second thought or hesitation.

She hurried over to the bed, her gorgeous breasts bouncing in the cool air before she slid between the warmth of the sheets.

I expected her to cuddle into me, her head on my chest as her long red hair poured over the blankets. But she didn’t.

She merely sat up in the bed beside me the covers pulled up and around her, providing her modesty.

I started the conversation with a gentle smile. “You look like you need to say something, sweetheart.”

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