Page 45 of Crave: A Reverse Harem Romance

I hated that I thought it, but…

I could really get used to this.

Chapter 13 - Axel

I looked over at Harlow, who was sleeping like a baby. Shortly after I had cuddled up next to her, she had fallen into a deep sleep.

I didn’t fall asleep right away, though. I couldn’t, because I kept having to remind myself that this was real… that I was cuddled up with the most interesting, gorgeous woman I’d ever met. It took probably an hour for me to fall asleep. I was just soaking in the feeling of holding her in my arms.

Eventually I did, though. But now, in the morning, I was once again staring at her as she slept, soaking her in. I couldn’t help myself. I’d never felt this way about any woman. She looked so peaceful sleeping next to me. I couldn’t take my eyes off of her.

It was different from the way I couldn’t take my eyes off of her previously. She was gorgeous, and when I’d stared at her before, it was with desire.

But this went so far beyond sex. I didn’t only desire this woman, I had a genuine, serious interest in her.

I felt a connection.

The problem was that I could tell I wasn’t the only one who felt this connection with her.

I wasn’t blind. I knew Ryker and my brother too damn well. We’d all been friends and co-owners for years. They both liked Harlow, I could tell. It had to be more than sexual with them too, because… well, first of all, Ryker doesn’t just hook up with any old girl at the club. And as far as my brother goes… I’d never seen him stare at any woman the way he stared at Harlow.

He cared for her, which was saying a lot for my brother. He didn’t get attached to women.

So what did this mean for all four of us?

I was racked with mixed emotions. On the one hand, I was thrilled that Harlow was lying in my bed. Somehow I was even happier that we hadn’t had sex. That meant those emotions I had weren’t one-sided. She cared for me, too… enough to be content to just lie here and cuddle with me. That said something.

Or did it? Was I reading into things? There was a chance that maybe it wasn’t me she had feelings for. Let’s be real here, Ryker and Diesel were some heavy competition. They were both rich like me, handsome like me… we all had our own qualities that made us attractive, interesting men.

It broke my heart to think about that, though.

So, what if she didn’t have feelings for me? What if this wasn’t reciprocated? That was a rejection I wasn’t even sure I could handle. I wanted her so desperately.

On the other hand, what if she did like me?

That meant that Ryker and Diesel would be heartbroken. Would this create a rift between us?

I had no idea because this had never happened before. We had never liked the same woman prior to this. Occasionally we’d overlap in our hookups, but that was just sex. This was something totally different.

What if they liked her as deeply as I did? Then no doubt, if she did have feelings for me and not them, it was going to bleed into our work and personal lives. They'd have to deal with the frustration and rejection that I was personally terrified of.

It didn’t seem like there were very many ways that this could go over well.

I felt some movement next to me and looked over to see Harlow stirring a little bit. She had this adorable look on her face. It was a little scrunched up, mostly at her eyebrows, like she was a little grumpy to be waking up. I thought any moment she was going to open her eyes and wake fully, but she didn’t. She just rolled over so that she was facing me and then seemed to fall right back to sleep.

There was one thing I absolutely knew. Despite how complicated this situation was and how messy things could get, I wanted to explore it. Even if it meant potentially making things difficult with my brother and Ryker. Even if it meant I was going to get rejected and get my heart completely broken.

I wanted that. I wanted her.

That was the thought I was filled with as I looked at her, her dark hair falling in front of her face and beauty exuding from her like it did every second of every day… and she wasn’t just beautiful. She was smart, she was kind, she was funny, intriguing… She was everything I wanted.

Though I wanted her more than anything, I also wanted her to be happy more than anything. So, yeah, I’d handle being rejected if it meant that she got to be with the man she truly wanted to be with. I wanted to see her get everything she wanted, even if it meant my heartbreak. She deserved that.

It was a weird feeling that I’d never had before. Not that I wasn’t kind, because I was always nice, especially to women. But this was selflessness like I’d never known it.

This girl had really gotten to me.

I climbed out of bed very, very slowly, sliding gently across my smooth comforter until I reached the edge of the bed. I really didn’t want to wake Harlow, but she didn’t stir. I tiptoed out of the room, grabbing my phone as I did which I’d left on the nightstand.

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