Page 17 of Stupid Dirty

If only I’d had that kind of foresight when it came to booze. For a guy that doesn’t talk a lot, he has a way of dropping these little observations that are so on point it’s scary. I lean in close to his face and squint like I’m suspicious.

“Silas, are you secretly super smart and insightful? Is that what’s going on? Did someone put a nerd’s brain in a motorcycle meathead’s body? Blink twice if you need me to smuggle you back into the secret government facility that spawned you.”

He blushes crimson, and it’s stupid cute. I notice for the first time that he’s got freckles dusting the bridge of his nose, and it makes him look younger.

I take a long pull of my drink. I can relax now that I’m less concerned that Silas has a secret drinking problem. Not that I wouldn’t have supported him, but y’know. It would have hit a little close to home.

Silas is watching me swallow, the blush fading from his cheeks as a crease forms between his eyebrows and I can tell he wants to ask me something. When I finally drain my cup, I raise an eyebrow at him, waiting for him to speak.

“What? Spit it out.”

He’s staring at my mouth, which makes me realize I have jack and coke smeared there, so I wipe it on the back of my sleeve. Eventually, his eyes flick back up and he looks at me.

“Why did you call your girlfriend a slut?”

Chapter Eight

Cade looks confused. Then he burps, because he just chugged his entire drink like he’s in a frat, and then he bursts out laughing so hard I think he’s going to fall over.

“What did I say?”

He’s still doubled-over at the waist and wheezing, but this makes him start laughing all over again. He takes what feels like hours to stop, and when he finally straightens up, he punches me in the arm, just like Wish did to him a few minutes ago.

“Silas, you sweet summer child.No.Why the fuck did you think that Wish was my girlfriend?”

I feel my cheeks warming, and I’m pretty sure I’m blushing harder than I did a minute ago when he made that joke about me being smart. I can never tell when he’s being serious and when he’s making fun of me. He might never be making fun of me, I don’t even know. But he’s always smiling that megawatt smile at me while he does it, which is good enough for me.

His laughter is infectious, and I crack a smile as well.

“I don’t know, man. You’re always together, you seem really happy around each other… Normal people have girlfriends! I don’t know!”

His grin downshifts to something smaller but more warm. Something just for me. I have to fight the urge to bask in it.

“First of all, please don’t lump me in with the normies when you’re assuming shit; I worked long and hard to become the white trash wackadoo you see before you. Second of all, I get that the whole friend thing is new to you, but I’m gonna let you in on a secret. Not only can you have friends, but you can have friends that aregirls.You don’t even sleep with them. It’s like they’re whole people with their own thoughts and personalities and shit. It’s magical, honestly.”

“That’s not what I meant.” I cross my arms over my chest, trying not to look like I’m sulking. I’m awkward, not an incel.

Cade tilts his head at me and keeps smiling. He bumps my shoulder with his playfully, but it’s not enough to move me.

“Come on, I’m only teasing. I know you didn’t mean it like that.”

There’s a pause, and his tone gets more somber.

“Wish is awesome. She’s been my best friend since junior year and she’s been there for me through a lot of shit. But this is back-ass-rural America, and she’s Wish, so she still gets shit from small-minded assholes sometimes. We both do. A lot of people still don’t think straight guys can have female friends. I’m a little protective of her, is all.”

“I bet. I would be too.” I can picture the kind of snide bullshit my dad would say if I was friends with a girl, let alone one who looked like her. “And you don’t mind that people give you shit?”

“What, homophobic shit? Nah. Fuck ‘em. If they’re so insecure they have to pick on other people’s friendships or sexualities or whatever to get off, they’re not worth my time. I have actual, real-life problems to deal with. I don’t have time to care aboutwhat people think I do to get my dick wet.” His brow furrows for a second. “Or notwet,I guess. Does the phrase still apply if the wetness is synthetic? I guess there’re fluids involved no matter what junk everyone has. But anyway, you get what I mean.”

“Hardly ever.” I smile at him so he knows I’m teasing.

He always goes off on tangents like this, and it’s kind of nice. It can be hard to follow the logic sometimes, but I’m always happy to let the constant, reassuring sound of his voice wash over me.

It’s nice not to feel alone, for once.

It’s already becoming a crutch. I don’t know how I’m going to cope with it whenever this comes to an end.

Cade claps his hands together, startling me out of my spiraling thoughts.

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