Page 14 of Cold As Ice

“Oh, that,” I said. “I’m not coming.”

Her expression fell, and I felt like a giant shit. But surely she didn’t expect me to say yes.

“Austin, please. It’s our first Christmas together in a long time. I’d really like it if—”

“I can’t, I’m sorry.”

“I see.” Her mouth twisted as she ate the rest of her bagel. But I felt her frustration in every bite, with every chew and swallow as she watched me.

Rory was pissed at me, but no more than I was pissed at myself.

“Come on, Sis.” I tried to lighten the mood. “You wouldn’t want me there anyway, playing the fifth wheel.”

“Don’t do that.” The quiver in her voice fucking gutted me. “Don’t act like this is funny. You’re my brother, Austin. I don’t want you to be alone for Christmas.”

She didn’t get it.

She didn’t get that being there with her and Noah, and Mason and Harper would only remind me of how fucked up I was.

She’d found her happily ever after. Despite what Mom had put her through, despite all the heartache and pain, the years of trauma that led to her developing an eating disorder, Rory had found happiness. Something I would never resent her for. But it didn’t stop me wondering how she’d done it.

How she’d trusted Noah to care for her heart after everyone around her—myself included—had let her down.

Fuck.

I dragged a hand back and forth through my hair, the tension between us turning so thick and heavy that I wanted to make an excuse and leave.

To escape.

I didn’t do this—I didn’t sit around and talk about my feelings.

I couldn’t.

“So I heard you ended things with Fallon?” Rory peeked over at me.

“Yeah, so?”

“I don’t know, I just thought maybe…” She trailed off, letting out a weary sigh. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Look, I appreciate you coming over here, bringing me breakfast, I do. But you don’t need to coddle me, Rory. I can look after myself.”

Hurt flashed in her eyes. “Is that what you think I’m doing? Coddling you?”

“Aren’t you? Just because you’re with Noah now, and everyone else is shacked up together, doesn’t mean—”

The blare of her cell phone cut through the room, and I was relieved. I was so fucking relieved for the distraction.

She dug it out of her purse and hesitated.

“Let me guess, Holden.”

It wasn’t a question. I could tell it was Noah by her expression. That flicker of longing in her eyes. Complete adoration.

“I’ll text and tell him—”

“You should answer it. I have shit to be doing anyway.” I started to walk away, but she called after me, “Austin, wait.”

“Yeah?” I looked back at her.

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