Page 64 of A Chance to Believe

‘I could learn to live with this.’

‘All you have to do is say yes to my proposition and you can have me on tap for a lifetime.’ He knew it was the wrong thing to say before the words had finished leaving his mouth.

Cassie spun around, smoothing down her t-shirt and adjusting the trackpants. ‘You said you wouldn’t pressure me.’

‘It was a joke. Ignore it.’

‘I can’t.’ She pushed herself to her feet and faced him. ‘I wasn’t going to tell you this now because I know you and your family are going through stuff with Jordan. I can’t do it. I won’t let myself be drawn into something I don’t want or need.’

‘You’re tired and upset. We don’t have to do this now.’

‘We do. I’m sorry, but today only proved I was right not to get involved. I didn’t even know you were in the the Rural Fire Brigade or SES until today. It’s bad enough with all the normal things people do that might get them killed. I can’t be with someone who wilfully goes out and does dangerous stunts.’

Shayne thrust himself up from the seat. ‘I don’t wilfully go out to do dangerous stunts. We work as a team, and we always work out how to do things in the safest way possible.’

‘Like you did today? Why didn’t you wait until the rest of the crew arrived and secured the accident site?’

‘Because Jordan was being slowly crushed to death by the weight of the tractor. It was only a matter of time before the tree collapsed and pushed the tractor down enough to sever his spine.’

‘So, you risked your own life. That’s not responsible.’

‘You’d happily have me stand aside.’

She waved one hand in a sharp negative. ‘Of course not. I just … I can’t be with someone who does dangerous things.’

‘How do you define dangerous? My sister died from falling off a horse. I still ride horses. My other sister died in a car accident and my brother was badly injured. I still drive cars. Jordan is in hospital after a farm accident. I use tractors and other machinery every day. These are things everyone does daily. You can’t make a choice not to be with someone who does something as basic as driving a car. You drive a car.’

‘That’s why I never planned to be involved with anyone.’

He gestured at her stomach. ‘What about the twins? Are you going to wrap them in cotton wool? Stop them riding bikes, travelling in cars. It’s not logical, Cassie. You can’t live at all.’ He huffed out a breath. ‘That’s what you’ve been doing, isn’t it? Not living. Staying safe in your cocoon. It won’t work. You have people in your life now that you love. They can’t be wrapped up like your memories and kept safe. They will want to live life to the full and you will have to let them, even if it means letting them do dangerous things. Because they will hate you if you trap them in your safe little world.’

‘That’s cruel.’

‘It’s reality. I’m a father, Cassie. I know what it’s like to let my little girl do dangerous things. I can make sure she wears her helmet on the horse and does everything as safely as possible. But the moment she’s on that horse and galloping full tilt into the arena, all bets are off.’

‘I can’t. I can’t lose more people that I love.’

Shayne wondered if she realised what she was admitting. He hated hurting her, but he couldn’t back down. His future depended on it. ‘You’ll lose them anyway, even if they live.’

‘I just …’ she gasped, clutching at her stomach. ‘Something’s happening.’

The fear in her voice broke him and he reached out for her. She pulled away. ‘Don’t touch me.’

She must have read the reaction to her recoil in his face. ‘No. No. It’s not that. I think my waters broke.’

Chapter 13

The gush of fluid trickled down the inside of the trackpants. Cassie stepped back from the rug onto the polished timber. It would be easier to clean up than the carpet. Everything was going in slow motion, even Shayne as he held up his hands, assuring her he would not touch her. His expression was concerned, but she’d seen the hurt in his eyes at her physical rejection. Coming on top of her verbal dismissal of anything between them, he was probably thinking she was a waste of space.

Why had she lost it? She’d been so determined to wait until Jordan was on the mend before saying her piece.

A sound dragged her attention away from Shayne. Dawn was at the door, a tea tray in her hands. Cassie wondered how much she’d heard. Too much, if the rigid expression on her face was any indication.

She put the tray down on a side table. ‘I’ll grab some fresh clothes and put them in the bathroom.’

Left alone with Shayne, Cassie gestured at her belly. ‘You were right. I’m sorry I was such a bitch.’

‘Women in labour get angsty. I’m sorry I pushed back. You didn’t need me getting all in your face over things that aren’t important.’

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