Page 189 of Claimed By a King

It’s been a few days since I started writing to my future self, and so far I’ve kept my promise to myself by writing daily. I haven’t read anything I’ve written, so for all I know it’s a whole lot of nothing that might not even make sense.

But that hardly matters as long as it serves its purpose, which it does. It’s almost like a cleansing of the soul, and it makes it easier for me to deal when things become hard or when difficult decisions need to be made. Like the reason we’re here now.

When the Santa Cruz PD finally released my dad’s body to his family, namely me, I didn’t know what to do. At first, I wanted nothing to do with him. The wound of his betrayal was still too fresh. But now, thanks to countless conversations with Gray, and so many journal entries I’m losing count, I finally know what I want to do.

“I’m sure,” I repeat, probably mostly to myself. Then I push the pull door, making us both laugh.

Inside, we’re greeted by an elderly man, Joel, I think his name is. “Ahh, Mr. and Mrs. Black,” he says, shaking both our hands.

The first time he made the assumption, Gray elbowed me when I tried to correct the man, so now I just let it go.

Though we haven’t talked about marriage, I know it’s something Gray wants. He made it clear when he told Dante why I was allowed at the meeting they had back when we were still at war with the Reapers.

It’s something I try not to think too much about because I’m not ready yet. My hesitance doesn’t come from doubtsor anything like that. Gray’s mine, that’ll never change. But I’m only eighteen and not in a rush. Now that I’ve gotten a second, third, and probably even fourth chance at life, I want to live it to the fullest.

“Have you decided what you want to do with your dad’s body?”

Joel’s question pulls me out of my thoughts, and I nod. “I want him buried in the unknown cemetery,” I say.

“I see. And you’re sure about this decision?” Joel asks.

Gray squeezes my hand. “She’s sure. Can it be arranged or not?” he asks, his tone leaving no room for discussion.

“Of course, of course,” Joel mutters. “But are you—”

I sigh. “I’m absolutely certain. He wasn’t my dad at the end. He was a stranger who didn’t care until it was too late.”

Joel nods and mutters to himself. I don’t pay much attention, annoyed at being questioned like that. I mean, I get it. It’s not a decision I’m taking lightly. But I’ve already had to convince myself that this was okay, so I don’t want to have to convince anyone else as well.

The thing is that, yes, Brian Miller was my biological dad. He raised me, and for years he was the picture perfect parent. But there’s no way I can forgive, let alone forget, what he did. His actions and choices are the reason mom and Leslie were killed. The reason I was tortured and raped.

Maybe he really grew a conscience in the end. Hell, maybe he had a plan all along… I’ll never know. But in the end, it doesn’t fucking matter. There’s no redemption for the shit he did, and I don’t want a place to visit him. I want him gone from my life, simple as.

I said the same thing to our family lawyer when he told me that part of my inheritance from dad was a letter. Unlike the one my mom left me, I never even saw the envelope my dad’s last words were wrapped in. I asked for it to be destroyed, and as far as I know, the words are gone. Maybe I’ll regret it one day, but I doubt it.

Everyone thinks they have reasons that justify the actions they take in life, and I’m sure my dad is no different. But thatdoesn’t mean he gets to poison my present and future with it.

We spend hours going over the necessary paperwork, and I’m quick to sign on every dotted line presented to me.

“Do you want to say goodbye to him?” Joel asks, his green eyes boring into mine.

I shake my head. “No,” I say, handing him my credit card. “We’re done.”

As soon as we’re finished, we leave, and I don’t look back over my shoulder. I get straight on Gray’s bike, and after a quick stop at a florist, he takes me to the cemetery so I can visit mom and Leslie.

“Come here,” I say, patting the cold dirt next to where I’m sitting.

“Are you sure?” Gray asks.

I roll my eyes. “Yes,” I simply answer.

When he joins me, I take his hand, and introduce him to mom first.

“Hey mom. So, I don’t know how it works up there. Can you guys really look down and see us scrambling on earth? If you can, well, then you already know everything that’s happened. And if you can’t… well, let’s just say some things are better left unsaid.”

Gray chuckles.

“I want to introduce you to Grayson Black. I know you already know him, kinda. But I want you to see who he is to me, okay?”

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