Page 1 of The Fool

Prologue

Let us begin with a party.

An innocent night of care-free fun amongst teenagers.

Nate Carter, the popular boy with a heart, was throwing one of his infamous bashes that aimed to let the kids of Westlake Prep let down their hair and give into their urges within the safe confines of the Carter household. Everyone knew who the Carters were, the girls in particular. There were few who hadn’t had a crush on at least one of them. The fact that they were known for their charming and respectful personalities as well as their mother’s Italian good looks, caused many a girl to daydream about being their girlfriend. Whereas the boys all wanted to be on first-name terms with them. Nate never discriminated against anyone who wanted to come, so long as they respected both his house and his rules.

However, with the number of people who were sure to attend, it was impossible for him to know each and everyone there. The odd guy with a pocketful of LSD; maybe a girl with itchy fingers for Mrs Carter’s jewelry; a man looking to take advantage of a naïve teenage girl, or perhaps a girl who had just been betrayed in the worst possible way and was looking for somewhere to escape from the pain. It would have been so easy for them to slip in undetected. Everyone knew Nate Carter; Nate Carter didn’t know everyone.

For one of those people, this night could have potentially been her last. Perhaps if she had met someone like the boy himself, he might have been able to change despair into hope. But she didn’t meet him on this night, she met someone who sought to take advantage of her vulnerability. Somebody who pushed her over the edge.

She only just managed to survive that night and what was to follow, but she didn’t begin living again for a long time. She didn’t begin to believe in a ‘happy ever after’or forgiveness until she finally met the youngest Carter brother.

And on that note, I shall begin with my story. The story of how I fell forThe Fool, otherwise known as Nathaniel Carter.

Chapter 1

Past

Bea, 18

Have you ever asked yourself, what’s the worst thing you’ve ever done?

What would your answer be?

Ran away from home?

Slept with another woman’s husband?

Caused someone to lose their life?

Called your brother in the middle of the night after taking a potent concoction of vodka and painkillers? And you did it right; you took those pills over time, hoping that when someone finally found you, you would have already slipped away.

I managed to tick off each of these transgressions before I’d even turned nineteen. My run of bad decisions began early in life, and I take responsibility for all of them. I could list off my excuses, and blame others for what I did, but ultimately, it was me who took my brother’s car without permission. It was my body that gave itself to a man who wasn’t free to take it. It was my actions that caused another to die, regardless of what they said. It was my finger that shakily managed to dial Ben’s number when I thought I was on my way out of this world. It was me; all me.

My admission has got you thinking now, got you questioning what the hell happened to turn this girl into a monster. It all began when my high school began an innocent online platform so students could talk to each other. A safe place, a private place, an unpoliced place. While they thought it would be a secure cyberspace for us to communicate about school projects, missed notes, or perhaps college choices, it turned into a place where you could let loose your ugly without anyone knowing who you really are. The wholesome jock and the homecoming queen who smile and hold the door open for everyone, the head of the school council, even the kid who donates his time to charity, they could all become villainous.

If you ever had the chance to read some of the comments that appeared online, you might believe the seven deadly sins had come up from the pits of hell to wreak havoc.

Envy frequently appeared in the form of gossiping about the girl who got the boy; did you hear? She opened her legs on the first date because she’s a slut with enough STDs to land you in the hospital if you so much as look at her.

Greed came in the form of the popular kids who wanted even more people to look up to them. The more likes and followers you had, the more you could tell yourself you were better than all the rest.

Vanity was for all those kids who masked what they really looked like with too many filters to count, people like my sister.

Lust is something we could all be accused of, the wanting someone from behind closed doors, even those who we already thought we had. I’ll openly admit, I lusted after my boyfriend, even after he hurt me in the worst possible way.

Sloth was for those kids who spent hours in front of this platform when they should have been working, spending time with their families, being at school, or even getting fresh air. It became an obsession for most, a time waster, something to help you avoid having to face real life.

Wrath frequently gave into itself on this platform, for where else could you vent your kind of hate without comeback, or revealing your true identity?

Pride came to all of us. No one wanted to admit it was getting just a little too much on there; to ruin it for everybody else.

And finally, gluttony. This was on all those people like me, the ones who kept on returning. You knew it was bad for you, and yet, you kept on going back for more –a glutton for punishment.

It didn’t destroy me straight away. Like any vice, it crept up on me, prayed on my weaknesses, my fears, as well as my bad days. Just when my senior year was coming to an end, and I naively thought I had survived it all, the bad days came at me like a series of tidal waves. I fought them at first, dove straight beneath the break, but pretty soon, they came at me without any pause for breath. I could no longer duck below the torrent of crushing water.

It was easy to spot the passive-aggressive messages that turned up on Western High’s webchat, the sly digs from people who you thought were your friends. However, I would usually let it slide off my back. I was the tomboy who had managed to bag one of the pretty boys; I was positively an urban legend. But this is exactly how Dean and I got together. I was one of the boys until my body morphed into something that could no longer hide the fact that I was a girl. A flirtation ensued before he finally leaned in and kissed me. It was so out of the blue, it was like a fairy tale. I kissed him right back and that was how we became Western High’s odd couple. I never paid it much attention, not even when I was told outright that I was extremely lucky to have him.

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