Page 5 of Lady of Darkness
I miss Theo’s smile.
It unnerves me that I miss them, the men who stole me from my real life and vowed to make it hurt in the process. I shouldn’t feel anything for them, but I can’t deny the hurt and loneliness of the past week.
The worst thing is, I wish they’d unleash themselves.
Iwishthey’d get their anger out. I want them to hurt me. I want to see them feelsomethingother than cold indifference.I want to get any sort of reaction out of them, because right now, they’re robots.
At least when they were monsters, I knew what to expect. Right now, I have no idea what’s around the corner. No idea when that dam will break.
One thing I know for sure is… that fury is coming, and it’s coming soon.
I just don’t know how, or when.
And that factterrifiesme.
I look over at Alaric as he drives to the gym. His face has some extra scruff today, which is unlike him. He looks tired–weary.Clenching his jaw, he quickly glances over at me before turning back to the road.
This is a totally fucked up situation.
I should be mad atthem.
They put me in a room with my rapist, and I was forced to kill him.
Just thinking about that day makes my blood turn cold.
And yet, I feel bad for doing what I did, for lacing those brownies with arsenic.
I was desperate.
I fought back.
And I lost.
I just didn’t expect to keep paying for it a week later.
Once Alaric pulls into the gym and parks, I follow him inside the large warehouse and find the other guys already working out.
I can’t help but drool a little as Theo does pull-ups effortlessly, his taut, muscled skin glistening with sweat. His light blue eyes sweep over me briefly before he resumes staring at the wall in front of him. I try not to stare at the way his corded arms work his body upward, how his muscles curve and twist as he does twenty more. Flicking my eyes to Sterling, I watch as he jogs casually on one of the treadmills. When his green eyes find mine, something dark passes behind them before he goes back to ignoring me, his fists clenched. Gideon is on one of the spin bikes, concentrating on the screen as he breathes. His hair is unbound and falls to his shoulders, held away from his face by a headband. I’ve never seen him with his hair down, but I like it. He ignores me completely, so I find my way to the treadmills to get my least favorite part of the workout out of the way.
At least I’m up to two miles now, and I don’t feel like a weakling anymore.
Over the last two weeks, I’ve noticed my endurance increasing, tiny muscles beginning to form on my arms, stomach, and legs. Nothing substantial to anyone but me, but still, it makes me feel like I’m working toward something.
Like this is all for some greater good.
I start off slow, increasing my speed until I find my preferred pace. Sterling looks over at me, and when I look at him, he snaps his eyes away.
Fine.
Be mad.
It doesn’t bother me.
Grinding my jaw, I increase my speed.
I can do this.
I don’t need their friendship.
