Page 100 of See Me

I watch her ass sway all the way down the hall and turn my head to take in the wreckage that litters the dining room. Each shard of glass I pick up seems to resemble a tiny piece of me she’s collected over the past few weeks, and she left a pile behind when she just blew my world up.

And I thought I had the upper hand.

TWENTY-NINE

PACKAGED PERFECTION

The sheets tanglearound my legs as I flip over for the forty-third time. I roll my eyes at Luca’s still form, one hand behind his head and the other resting on his bare chest, having not moved a muscle since his head hit the pillow.

I don't sleep well… liar.

Half of his face reflects jagged slivers of light filtering in through the blinds. His features have a softness to them that disappear when he’s awake—so much so I wouldn't believe he didn’t wear a permanent scowl if I wasn’t witnessing it up close.

I don’t know his story and I’ve kept myself off the internet as we sort of have an unspoken agreement not to get into thenitty gritty. It’s his story and I don’t want some skewed reporter’s version of it…sorry Cassie. I’d rather hear his version, if at all. Whatever it was, he still struggles with it. The temper, the rage, jealousy, and above all else, his need for control. I pushed my luck when I called him out. But he gave a piece of himself away in the process, so I don’t regret it. His visceral reaction to being called on it was a flashing neon sign. And I certainly don’t regret the way he handled me after.

Holy geez, I can still feel the burn.

The scorching burn of his hands around my neck and the stretch I felt when he buried himself over and over with reckless abandon... I don’t regret that one bit. Being held down was… liberating. That doesn’t even make sense in my own head, but that’s the only way to describe it. He let loose an animal and the only way to contain her was to physically restrain her. My face heats at the memory. And who knew being set free and dominated at the same time would be so flippin’ hot?

My mind flashes with all the things I would let this man do to me and welcome it. I conjure up a picture of him in studded leather with a whip and I have to slap a hand over my mouth to stifle my laugh.

He stirs and rolls toward me, hand landing on my hip. His eyes remain closed as he kneads my flesh and pulls me closer. It’s not the first time he’s reached for me in his sleep, but I always wake to an empty bed.

I tuck my hands under my chin but nuzzle my head into the crook of his neck. I haven’t been able to put a name to his smell other than just… Luca. Whatever it is, it causes a primal reaction and my thighs tingle with a soreness when I squeeze them together. His hands roam freely as he sleeps, breathing deep and even.

I jump when his alarm pierces the peaceful cocoon I’mbasking in. I lift my head to allow him to roll and reach his phone. His eyes meet mine, eyebrows drawn together when he fully wakes up and realizes we were cuddling. I could close my eyes and let him escape this small faux pas, but I don’t. We look at each other for a moment before he rubs the sleep from his eyes and silently leaves the bed.

Does he realize he does this every night?

He has to notice when he wakes up. Or is that look only because I was awake this time to witness it? Such a complicated creature he is.

I sigh and throw the sheets off as I sit on the edge of the bed. When I hear the water turn on in the bathroom I remember I haven’t put his gift under the tree yet. Today is only the eve but I’m going to Cassie and Jace’s later for dinner and we both work Christmas day.

I throw my crazy hair into a bun and pad down the hall. I pull the few wrapped packages out of the hall closet and make my way over to the haphazardly decorated tree we never fully finished. I freeze when I see a large, glittery gold box already placed underneath. I stalk closer and place my packages down and run my finger over the silk bow so perfectly wrapped around the box.

“Go ahead and open it.”

I jump when Luca speaks behind me. He saunters into the room in nothing but sweat pants and tousled hair and my mouth salivates at the sight of him.

“Really? Now?” I’m already eagerly reaching for the package and he chuckles.

He rubs his chin and shrugs. “Well, maybe we should wait until tomorrow.”

I stop with the package halfway to my lap and physically deflate. “Oh. Okay.” I crawl closer to the tree to put it back.

He sits on the couch and leans back. “Ella, open the package.I’m just teasing.” His face appears relaxed, no scowl, but he rubs his hands together and the foot he crosses over his knee twitches. He’s nervous.

He’s nervous and it’s adorable.

I grab the other packages and walk them over to him. His eyes dart up to my face, widened with surprise.

“What? Did you think I wouldn’t getyouanything?” I place the packages next to him when he doesn’t take them. I retrieve my gift and walk back over to sit on the coffee table in front of him. He looks at the two red shimmery packages but doesn’t move a muscle.

I clear my throat and he swings his eyes to meet mine. The softness remains, an almost childlike look in his eyes. The weight of the day hasn’t settled in yet.

He smiles. “You first.”

I’m immediately embarrassed by the squeal I let out but don’t hesitate to tear into the paper. The box covers my entire lap and it has weight to it. I toss the paper with no care where it lands and peel the box open. I glance up at Luca while I dig out the tissue paper. He’s wearing a small smile but it doesn’t reach his eyes.

---