Page 74 of Enjoying the Band in Lockdown

Xavier picked me up, swinging me until I squealed. Only Chase decided to playfully fight over who could carry me, bridal style, back into the pub.

“Hey, what am I missing out on,” Devon asked, his cheek still bruised from where Angelo had landed a passing shot.

“You, my love,” I chose my words carefully. “Haven’t missed out on anything, at least for tonight.”

I looked around. Jax had taken over the computer, updating social media and responding to fans. At my suggestion, the guys were taking hour long shifts answering questions, playing songs and turning audience into fans.

“How’s it going?” I asked, hoping for once Jax could be a musician instead of an asshole.

“Trent’s song is already trending.”

“What?” Xavier and Chase weren’t amused, but at least Devon and I were genuinely happy. “I didn’t think it was ready for publishing.”

“It’s not,” Jax didn’t look up. “We put up one stanza, that’s it. Enough to go through the roof.” Now he looked up, sneering at Xavier, “Trent’s about to knock Dirty Blonde off its little pedestal.”

“Did you know the girl?” I asked Devon and Xavier, willing to ignore Jax, again.

“Yeah, we don’t talk about her.” Devon shrugged.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Not our story to tell,” Xav said after sharing glances with Dev and Jax. They’d talked about it and decided I didn’t need to know. It said a lot that they were still brothers first and despite what had happened, I hadn’t come between them.

“I get that, but knowing would have explained a lot.”

“Or nothing at all.” Chase said.

“Coffee or kisses?” Jax, snuck up behind me in the cellar. I’d had to restock after Xavier’s meltdown.

“Why do I have to choose?” The choice was getting monotonous and I hadn’t changed my mind. No answer was better than any answer.

“Because I’m asking you to.”

“Why do I have to choose?” Jax tried to move closer, but I held my hands to his chest, keeping distance between us. “You’ve got what you wanted.”

“No. I didn’t.”

Fine. He wanted to play this game; he’d hunted me down. Now he could deal with what he’d done. “Jax, you fucking won. You wanted to break me; well you did. You wanted to break Xavier; you did. You wanted to put me in my place and remind me I wasn’t the name of a song; I wasn’t even the dirt under your shoes. You wanted me to be nothing, well, you got it. I’m nothing.”

I screamed the last at him. Hoping the others didn’t hear.

Desperately hoping Xavier never even thought the words.

“Coffee or kisses.”

“Jax, go away. Please just go away.” I didn’t have the strength to fight him, not anymore.

“Coffee or kisses?” Jax said again, his lips close enough to bite, or kiss. “You always complain that I take without asking. I’m asking you, Sydney, coffee or kisses?’

“Jax, I actually believed you.” Apparently, I had more truth to throw at him. “I believed you in the cave. I believed you afterwards. I believed you, and it turns out I meant nothing more than any of your one-night hook-ups.”

“You really believe that?” He looked genuinely confused. But I’d seen his lying face before. It looked the same as his real face.

“Yes, I do.”

“Then, I’ll give you a choice Sydney.” He traced my lips before drawing down my neck. I wanted so much to push him away, but being able to resist Jax didn’t seem to be one of my super powers. “Them or me, Sydney, them or me.”

“What?”

---