Page 67 of Sin Like the Devil

“Nox—”

“Just don’t call me next time you’re stuck.”

For once, I don’t have the desire to shout and rave. I’ve punched my way through life since Daisy died and fought off any threats against those I care about with fists and blood. But what has that left me with?

No living family.

Two messed-up friends.

And a whole lot of dysfunction.

I couldn’t protect Xander from the fucked up shit they did to us in the Z wing. The deep freeze bathtubs that made him lose a toe. Electrocutions. Sensory overload. Sleep deprivation.

Every last medieval torture tactic designed to strip a person’s soul away was tried at least once. After all that, they thought we were unbreakable. That we were in fact the perfect stooges to run their operation because we refused to crack.

But little did those sadistic doctors know, we did break. Just in ways we allowed our pain to escape undetected. Those moments happened when the machines were turned off and cell doors locked.

Breaking isn’t always a loud, cataclysmic implosion of a person. Sometimes it’s silent. Imperceptible. I took my hatred and stoked those righteous flames to keep myself warm at night. Xander wrapped his ice-cold detachment around himself for comfort instead.

“Later.”

“Nox!” Raine shouts after me.

I’m already storming away, unable to look at him for a second longer. Seeing Daisy’s sweet, teenage face superimposed over his is harrowing. I let her down. I couldn’t save her from evil or even herself. Stopping Raine from slowly poisoning himself isn’t going to bring her back.

The heavens open, sending silvery bullets of rain hammering to the ground. It doesn’t stop me from storming into the thick tree line, needing an escape. I’m soaked through in seconds, but I keep walking into the underbrush.

I soon find the perimeter fence. Harrowdean is small and self-enclosed, a clandestine bubble of pure evil, tucked into the fringes of society. Grasping the slick chain-links that hold us all captive, I stare into the forest beyond.

If Daisy hadn’t died, I never would’ve ended up here. That monster didn’t just kill my sister, he killed us both in one fell swoop. I ruined my own life in a torrent of rage and grief, hoping that revenge would somehow ease the agony of finding my baby sister’s corpse.

It didn’t ease the guilt. The grief.

Instead, my anger only grew.

“You shouldn’t be here,” a familiar voice calls out.

Startled, I glance to the side. Ripley is blurry through the thick rainfall, but her mass of sopping wet curls is unmistakable. She sits at the base of a tall juniper tree, her knees pulled tight to her chest.

Even in the rain, I can see the purple bruising on her face where I slammed it into the table. Knowing I inflicted those bruises should be satisfying, but the usual fury that fills me at the sight of this bitch doesn’t come.

All I can muster is sadness. If things had been different, perhaps I wouldn’t have ruined her life. And she wouldn’t have ruined mine. We’re both caught in this ceaseless cycle of violence.

“Are you following me?” Ripley asks in her usual disinterested tone.

I bark out a bitter laugh. “Believe it or not, my life doesn’t revolve around you.”

“Well, shucks. Isn’t that a disappointment.”

I shouldn’t enjoy the heavy sarcasm dripping from her tone. This short, curvy wisp of a woman is responsible for some of the bleakest months of my life. Unimaginable agony and desolation.

All in the name of some bullshit revenge. At least I can understand her motivations. The shit I’ve done all in the name of revenge would be newsworthy too. But what if she’d killed Raine? Or Xander?

Would I have done the same to her?

I don’t know who the villain is anymore.

“It’s raining,” I point out the obvious.