Page 71 of Loving Netta Wilde

‘We should check the hospitals. And his road. And the pubs,’ said Netta.

‘We’ll go to his road,’ said Arthur.

‘I’ll come with you,’ said Liza.

‘I’ll call round the hospitals,’ said Frank.

Suddenly everyone was busy running around in different directions. Doogie reached into his pocket for his car keys. ‘I’ll try the pubs.’

Claire pulled him back. ‘No, I’ll try the pubs. You stay here with Netta.’

So that was the way it was going to go then? Just him and Netta. People were moving around them, getting their things together to set out on their searches but all Doogie could see was Netta, her endlessly deep, dark eyes full of hurt. He’d been right, there was going to be a fallout.

His mind took him back thirty years to the day she’d found out he’d been seeing someone else. A girl he’d met while they were on one of their legendary break-ups. To him she was just a friend who’d been helping him discover his Black roots, but as usual he’d let things go too far and it got complicated. He’d tried to keep them separate, but Netta had seen them together on that day and that had been the end of everything. His hopes, his dreams. Everything. She’d had that look in her eye then, right before she told him he was toxic, and she hated him. Right before she told him never to talk to her again. Later that day, she met Colin the Wanker.

Frank was the last of them to go, and then it was just him and Netta and a load of dogs, none of which was his. Doogie shoved his hands in his pockets and waited.

‘So I hear your mum isn’t on her holidays. I hear Spike is with her, not some random business acquaintance.’

‘No, she’s not, and yes he is.’

She put her fingers against her temple, like she had a headache that needed clearing. The headache, of course, was him. ‘I don’t understand. Why did you lie?’

‘Because I thought you wouldn’t let me stay here if you knew I’d got somewhere else to go.’

‘But why would you want to stay here with all this Colin stuff going down? I’d have thought the further away the better would suit you.’

‘I wanted to be close to you.’

‘Because of Colin?’

He went to say yes, but he held back for just a moment too long, and she caught it.

‘It’s not because of Colin, is it? Claire said there was more to it.’

‘Claire knows shit.’ He’d gone in too hard. He could tell by the look on her face. He should have known better than to criticise Claire.

‘Oh really. Why don’t you tell me then, Doog? Tell me what you’re really doing here.’

‘I’m here to protect you.’

‘To protect…’ She interrupted herself with a laugh. ‘From what? From Colin? Or Frank? You know what, don’t bother to answer. It doesn’t matter. I don’t need anyone’s protection. I can protect myself.’

‘I’m sorry, I just thought… Forget it.’

‘You thought it was the perfect excuse. You’re not telling me the whole truth, are you?’ She grabbed hold of his arms. ‘Tell me why you’re really here, and don’t give me any bullshit this time.’

‘It’s Grace. She wants to get married.’

‘Oh!’ This time it was her turn to hesitate. ‘That’s great, isn’t it?’

He didn’t answer. He was looking at those fucking eyes of hers again, thinking about how they were giving away her true reaction.

‘Are you going to?’

‘I don’t know.’

She turned away from him. ‘You should. You should marry her.’

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