Page 88 of Gray Area

I love you

D.

I crumple the paper as rage and heat replace the cold dread I had just felt. I throw the ball of paper in my backpack. I am in the middle of nowhere, with no way to leave and people who want to kill me, and my boyfriend has taken my only means of communication.

Who says romance is dead?

I pick up the card and phone, which thankfully still has almost a full battery left in it from when I last used it. I shake as I punch in the card numbers, and I’m not sure if it is anger, sadness, or fear that is driving the tremors, but I push through them.

I call Declan, and the phone immediately goes to voicemail, so I send a text.When are you coming back?

I want to say so many other things, but texting from a TracFone is not simple, especially if you are shaking with rage.

Then I call Bailey, because she levels me out.

“Hello?” she says on answering, sounding confused.

“Hey Bails! It’s me,” I say, smiling at the sound of her voice.

“Viv? Is this your old Tracfone number?”

“Yeah,” I say and my voice cracks. “Do you have a minute?”

“Of course, babe! What’s going on?” And I open the dams and tell her everything. I’m sobbing by the time I finish, hiccupping with a roll of toilet paper beside me half-used. “Wow,” Bailey says over my gross noises, “that is crazy and fucked-up.”

“I don’t know what to do,” I tell her.

“Okay, Vivian, what do you want here? You want opinions or you just want an ear?” she asks, ready to be whatever I need.

I settle myself and think. “I need opinions. I’m not sure I can trust mine.”

“Okay, well, here it is. I can sorta see his need to protect you and keep you safe and in the dark about it. It sounds dangerous, like he’s dealing with, like, a Marvel villain or some shit.”

“But—”

“No, Viv, you asked and I need to give it all. Save all questions for the end,” she reprimands me, and I laugh despite my mood. “But I get your concern. He withheld some stuff in the beginning and now he is keeping you in the dark with this. So you’re worried he’s like a repeat lie offender, right?”

“Yeah,” I say.

“And you’re also worried he is going to hurt you really bad, like worse than now, right? By keeping things from you?”

“Yeah. Got any advice?”

Bailey blows out a breath into the phone. “You really need to go with your gut on this, Viv. Declan is crazy about you, and I know you feel the same way about him. So that’s going to cloud you a bit. But I think he really does have your best interest at heart here. Maybe let things calm down, and talk this out with him before you make any big decisions.”

“You’ve made some good points,” I tell her, evaluating her presentation.

“I mean, the bestie in me wants to shank him in the kidney for making you cry,” she admits, and again I laugh. “But then him keeping you safe does give me a bit of the warm fuzzies. Just trust your gut, and if you need outta there, you can always come and stay with me.”

“Thank you, Bailey,” I say, feeling better with the connection to her already.

“Miss you, Viv. Please stay safe.”

“I will,” I promise and we say our goodbyes.

Be patient, I decide, is what I need to do. Declan and I will figure it all out, I tell myself.

Chapter 53

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