Page 73 of Rules

My shoulder bumps against a hard surface, bringing back snapshots of what happened tonight.

Car.

Max.

Home.

I asked Max to take me home.

My eyes fly open, scanning the space around me. I wasn’t asleep; I’m not even sure I’ll be able to. But when I sat down in the cozy leather seat and Max cranked up the heat, exhaustion finally caught up to me. My eyes fell shut, but my mind kept working. Thinking, wondering, if I’d maybe done something differently, if I hadn’t said the things I did to those guys, tonight would have turned out differently.

“I know you wanted to go to Lia’s, hell maybe you even wanted to gohomehome, but I…” He stops, lost for words.

Shaking his head, he pulls at his messy hair. “I just couldn’t…”

“It’s…” My voice comes out raspy and low, so I clear my throat before trying again. “It’s okay.”

As long as I wasn’t there, I didn’t care where I was.

Pulling my legs closer to my chest, I let the silence fall over us as we stare at the two-story Victorian mansion covered in darkness.

“Are you…” Max starts, but I stop him before he’s even done asking.

“I’m fine.”

Sighing, his hands grab the steering wheel, gripping so tightly his knuckles turn white.

“Brook, what hap—”

“Nothing happened,” I grit through my clenched teeth.

I can’t talk about it. I can’t think about it. If I do… If I do it’ll bring out the memories that are better left forgotten. Memories I’m not equipped to deal with right now.

“But it could have!” Max yells, his fist connecting to the steering wheel, making me flinch. “Dammit, Brook! Something could have happened and…”

“You think I don’t know that?” I fire back at him, done with his nosiness. “I was there, Max! I was the one who was shamed and violated in the worst way a woman can be violated, so don’t you dare act like you know shit. Don’t you dare pretend like you understand, because you can’t.”

My hands grip tighter around my legs, pulling them closer to my chest. Small, I feel so small and breakable. If I don’t hold tight, I might actually fall apart.

The silence stretches between us, neither of us knowing what to say. Or maybe he’s just afraid if he does say something, I’ll break. Not that I can blame him. My whole body still trembles from what happened, and even the smallest of sounds, the tiniest movement makes me react.

Finally, I’m the one who breaks the quiet. Giving in, if only just a tiny bit. “I can still feel their hands on my body.” I swallow the lump in my throat, the stale taste of puke lingering in my mouth. I don’t dare look at him, afraid of what I’ll find when I face him. “And it takes everything in me not to throw up. My skin still crawls at the thought of their touch. At the thought of…”

I turn my head to the side. Closing my eyes, I fight the memories assaulting my mind.

Not now. I can’t deal with this now.

“So pretty, Brookie. So, so pretty.” His hands slide down my waist, caressing the underside of my small, naked chest, over my stomach and dipping into the elastic of my panties. “And so soft.”

His head bows down, slurred words murmured into my skin as his lips touch me. His clammy, fat fingers pull down my panties, scratching me in the process. I yelp softly, tears running down my cheeks.

“N-no… Please…”

But of course, he doesn’t listen. Heneverlistens.

Covering my mouth, I open the door hastily, almost falling out in the process, but if I don’t get out, I’m going to throw up all over the leather interior.

“Brook!” Max yells, he too, getting out of the car.

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