Page 72 of Midnight Surrounds Us

“Iloveyou, Spitfire, and that’s who you’ll always be to me: someone who’s bold and brave and wild. Someone who doesn’t let life tear her down. No, you take it by the balls and make it yours.”

She stared up at me, tears finally filling her wide brown eyes.

Holding both her hands in mine and gripping them tightly, I whispered, “Make it yours, Aubrey. Makemeyours,” and I leaned down and kissed her.

She whimpered into my mouth and slipped her tongue inside, and I tilted my head and let her breath and her taste wash me clean from the inside out. She planted her hands on my shoulders and jumped up, and I held her in my arms.

It was right where she belonged, but the kiss felt like goodbye.

“There’s all these grays between us when you let your worries rule you,” I said softly, looking in her eyes, trying to find any hope I could, “but I’ll be plain. I want you, and when I look at you, all I see is color. I see your rose-gold hair and your amber eyes that smile and light up for me. I see that pink dress, the one that haunted my dreams for half my life. I see green grass out in front of me, and you’re runnin’ to me on bare feet, with the yellow sun at your back and the blue sky above you. Why can’t you see it too?”

“Why do you have to say things like that?” she said, tears finally falling, and she threaded her fingers through my hair. “Make love to me, right here, right now.”

Setting her back on her feet, I untangled her hands gently and placed them at her sides. “No.”

She pulled back, took a step away from me, and hurt and fear and regret washed over her face, one devastation at a time.

“As much as I wanna take you and claim you right fuckin’ now, sex can’t fix this.” No matter how much I wished it could.

“That’s not what I?—”

“It is what you meant. You want me to fuck you so you can tell yourself that’s all it was between us, just some good, fake sex between the goodbye girl and the young cowboy. But that’snotall this is, and you damn well know it in your heart.”

“Rye—”

“Be at the ranch, ten o’clock Sunday mornin’. That’s when the festivities start. Come hungry and ready to dance with me. Come ready to claimme.”

Her tears fell like rain now, and I kissed her nose and her cheek, her forehead and her hair, trying like hell not to cry too. I wanted to memorize her smell, the feel of her skin on my lips and in my hands. I wanted to convince her all the things running through her mind were fleeting worries and nothing more.

I wanted her to know we belonged together.

But I couldn’t make her believe it any more than I could make myself believe that I’d be okay if she wasn’t at G&S in less than a week.

“I’m goin’,” I said. “I have to ’cause you got some thinkin’ to do.” Kissing her lips softly, I said, “I won’t be here, but I’mhere.” I laid my hand over her heart. “You call me if you need to talk. Text me if you need to laugh, but think about what I said. Okay?”

Finally, she nodded.

“Love you, Spitfire. There ain’t nothin’ fake about the way I feel, but I need to know you love me too. For real. That I’m important enough to you for you to make room in your life for us, to let all the bullshit go, say ‘fuck the fear,’ andloveme. I’m yours forever if you can.”

Turning away from her, I grabbed my hat off the counter and fixed it on my head. I pulled the brim down low, and then I made myself walk away.

I just hoped like hell it wasn’t the last time.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

AUBREY

My best friendanswered my call, and my voice cracked. “Roxi?”

“Yeah? What’s wrong?”

“Everything’s all messed up. I dunno what to do!”

“Wait. Slow down. Are you cryin’? I’m comin’ over. Are you at home?”

“The shop.”

“Be right there.”

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