Page 79 of Of Oaths and Secrets

When I wake, I’m not on the couch anymore. I’m in Rafaele’s bed, his strong arms wrapped protectively around me, his chest pressed warmly against my back. His breath tickles the back of my neck, steady and comforting, and I can feel the slow rhythm of his heartbeat against my spine. As if sensing I’m awake, his grip tightens slightly, and he presses a soft kiss against the nape of my neck, pulling me closer.

I stir, turning over to face him. His lips brush tenderly against my eyelids, warm and sweet. “You look tired,” he murmurs, his voice soft with concern. “Have I been pushing you too much? With the sex, I mean.”

A quiet laugh escapes me. “No, Rafaele. I want you just as much. I’m okay—just a little run down.”

Even as the words leave my mouth, guilt twists inside me. I hate lying to him, but right now, I’m just trying to sort through everything myself. I need to figure out what’s happening with my body, with the baby. I don’t want to overwhelm him with all the risks, especially when I don’t have all the answers yet.

He watches me closely, his dark eyes searching mine, still unconvinced, but he nods, letting it go for now. “Okay,” he says softly, brushing a strand of hair behind my ear. “But if anything’s wrong, you tell me.”

“I will,” I promise, knowing I’m not telling him everything.

He rests his forehead against mine and closes his eyes, exhaling softly. “My father wants us to go to his place for dinner tomorrow night. I dodged it as long as I could, but… Unless you really don’t want to go, then I’ll figure something out.”

I hesitate for a moment but then shake my head. “No, it’s okay. I don’t mind.” I do mind, though. I hate the way his father treats him—the man who shaped the harsh edges of the man I married—but I don’t want to add more strain between them.

He presses his lips gently against mine, keeping them there for a moment before pulling back. “Stay in bed, amore. I’ll take Fate out.” He glances at the foot of the bed where Fate is curled up in a tight ball. “Or maybe not. Looks like she wants a lazy morning too.”

I smile, burying my face deeper into the pillow. “Your bed is so comfortable. It’s hard to leave.”

He’s quiet for a beat, and when I glance up, I catch him propped on his elbow, just watching me. His gaze is soft but intense, filled with an emotion I can’t quite place.

“What?” I ask, a hint of a smile tugging at my lips.

“Stay.”

I frown, confused. “I’m not going anywhere for the next few hours.”

“No,” he says, his voice lower, more deliberate. “I mean… stay here. In this room. Move your things in and make this our room.”

His lips brush against my forehead, remaining there as his request hangs between us. “You don’t have to decide now. Just think about it. I’d love that… very much.”

And with that, he slips out of bed, leaving me to process what he’s just asked. The warmth of his words wraps around me like the duvet, and though he’s gone, the space he’s left feels fuller somehow.

I drift back to sleep, but when I wake up again a couple of hours later, reality settles in like a weight on my chest. I need to take the next step. I can’t avoid this any longer.

With a sigh, I sit up and reach for my phone. I know what I have to do—I need to book an appointment with my doctor. My fingers tremble slightly as I dial the clinic, and after a brief conversation, they manage to schedule me with the specialized OB-GYN for today. That’s the advantage of wearing the Lucchese name, I suppose, but it also means Rafaele will find out soon.

I feel a pang of guilt as I get ready to leave, knowing he would want to come with me. He would want to be there for this, no question about it. But despite that, I can’t bring myself to tell him—not yet. I want to hold onto the way he sees me for just a little longer before introducing the reality of the risks and complications. The idea of him looking at me differently, with worry or concern, is almost unbearable.

By the time I arrive at the clinic, nerves have fully settled in. The waiting room feels too quiet, the ticking clock on the wall too loud, only heightening my anxiety. When I’m finally called in to see the doctor, I try to take a steadying breath.

Dr. Bennett is a kind-looking man in his fifties, with graying hair and a reassuring smile. He shakes my hand and gestures for me to sit down. “Mrs. Lucchese,” he says, glancing at his chart, “I see you’re here for a pregnancy consultation.”

I nod, my heart thudding in my chest. “Yes. I took a few tests at home, and they were all positive.”

He nods, his expression serious but not unkind. “Let’s confirm that with a proper test here, and then we can talk about the next steps, given your medical history.”

After a quick blood test, he returns with the results. “Congratulations, Mrs. Lucchese,” he says with a gentle smile. “You’re definitely pregnant.”

A mix of emotions surges through me—joy, fear, excitement. But reality quickly settles back in as Dr. Bennett continues.

“I understand you have both fibromyalgia and lupus,” he says, his tone growing more serious. “That does introduce some risks, both for you and the baby, but it’s not insurmountable. We’ll need to monitor you closely throughout the pregnancy. With lupus, the concern is primarily with flare-ups, especially in the third trimester. We want to avoid complications like preeclampsia, and we’ll have to watch for any signs of organ damage or inflammation.” He pauses, letting the gravity of the situation sink in. “As for the fibromyalgia, pregnancy can sometimes exacerbate the pain and fatigue. It’s important to manage stress and get as much rest as possible, though I know that can be difficult.”

I swallow hard, trying to process everything he’s saying. “So… what does that mean? For the baby, I mean?”

“There’s a chance of complications,” he admits, his expression compassionate but honest. “But with proper care and close monitoring, we can mitigate many of those risks. It’s important that you maintain a healthy lifestyle, keep your stress levels low, and come in regularly for checkups.”

I nod, my heart pounding.

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