Page 61 of Waiting for Her

What I don’t say is I have doubts Iwillever move on from her. She’s only been back in my life for a few days, and I still can’t imagine a future without her.

More tears streak down her cheeks as my words settle in. As much as it kills me to see her cry, she has to hear everything. I lower my voice as I notice Hazel getting closer. Bless Drew’s heart for recognizing we still need a little bit more time, so he distracts her by continuing to play with Rocky along the way.

She seems to brace herself before admitting, “Maybe I don’t want you to move on.”

Her words wrap around my heart, flaring up a promise I thought was ancient history. “I won’t let you hurt me again, Bri. I can’t. It took me a long time to get over you. And it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. Harder than recovering from the accident.”

Bri looks down at her hands, twisting them together. “I meant what I said about not wanting you to move on,” she whispers. “But it’s not because I want to keep you on the hook. I know we have a long road ahead of us, but I’m willing to do whatever it takes to prove to you I’m not going anywhere.” She licks her lips, tasting her tears and it makes me irrationally jealous. I wish so badly we were in a place where I could be the one tasting her, touching my lips to hers. And that alone pisses me off. Despite everything, I still want her so desperately, I can feel it in my bones.

I feel like I’m on one of those pendulum thriller rides that takes you up in the sky then before you know it you’re swinging to the other direction. I hate those rides. My thoughts about her going this way and that. I don’t know what to do with this whiplash I’m experiencing. The possibility of the future I once only dreamed of rises to the surface.

“We do have a long road ahead.” I agree with a nod, my eyes never leaving hers.

I feel the shell around my heart beginning to crack. The same shell that hardened so many years ago, protecting myself from once again getting hurt.

I abruptly stand up, making my way over to Hazel. I bend down and pick her up, playfully snuggling my face into her neck. She giggles and squirms as my stubble tickles her soft skin.

“I love you, baby girl. Come see me and Rocky again, yeah? I’ve missed you.”

She leans back, takes my face in her tiny hands. Her hazel eyes are wide as she stares at me. “I’ll never be far away,” she tells me.

How is she only six?

“Good. Want to give Rocky a treat before you head back to your sister’s house?” I ask Hazel, dismissing Bri at the same time. I need time to think and if she stays here much longer, I’m going to end up kissing her, which doesn’t solve anything. She and I need to finally sit down and discuss what kept her from me for the past six years, and until we’re alone, that’s not going to happen.

Hazel follows me inside and I grab a treat from the container sitting on the counter in the kitchen. She runs back outside to give Rocky her offering.

Bri’s looking down at the table, her face pinned to my phone. I glance down when I hear my phone ping a reminder of the text I just received and her body jerks, her gaze still trained on whatever words she’s reading. I’m far enough away I can’t see what she’s seeing, and I don’t bother to call her out on being nosey. I have nothing to hide from her.

“Bye, squirt. Don’t be a stranger, Rocky will miss you,” I say, crouching down next to Hazel to give her a hug. She launches herself at me and I pretend it knocks me over, Rocky coming over to lick the both of us.

“I love you, Grady,” she says in the sweetest little girl voice, and my heart cracks wide open, bleeding out right onto the grass beneath me.

I take a peek up at Bri whose face has gone slack. She clears her throat and wipes under her nose. “We’d better go, Hazel. Mommy’s gonna wonder where you are.”

“Okay.” Hazel stands off me after smacking a kiss to my cheek. “Bye Drew! I’m glad we finally met!”

He chuckles and gives her a low wave.

Bri guides Hazel back to her house after a murmured good bye. I look at my phone and read the text that caused Bri to worry and scrub a hand down my face.

Kennedy:I really want you to come…

The ellipse following her text was suggestive enough but then, of course, she had to include a picture in the text. Of her in a barely-there outfit.

“What’s wrong?” Drew asks me, as I stare at my phone.

“I think Kennedy’s losing her damn mind.”

“Why’s that?” he chuckles.

I debate for a moment about whether or not to show him the picture and decide against it. She didn’t send it to me to show everyone. She sent it to me to… what, I don’t really know. To make me change my plans for tomorrow night? To get me thinking of her in a different way?

What the hell is up with her?

“I think maybe she’s under the impression that we’re shifting into more than friends territory.”

“Well, yeah, I figured that was coming.”

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