Page 57 of The Path To Us

“Holy shit,” I whisper. “Yes.” The word is barely out of my mouth when I’m being pushed back, my bedroom door closing behind us and locked. With one hand around my waist, he keeps walking us until the backs of my knees hit the edge of my bed.

“Addy. I need to kiss you,” he says in the lowest voice I’ve ever heard from him.

And when he follows it up with our first real kiss?

I want to cry and scream and jump up and down with happiness all at once.

And thank goodness he’s not finished. Oh, no. He’s far from finished. He pushes me onto my back, my leg bent in between his and then his tongue is inside my mouth.

Beau’s kissing me.

Really, really kissing me. It’s an unforgettable kiss that has my toes curling and my fingers gripping his shoulders as our tongues tangle and plunge. We kiss like our lives depend on it until we have to separate to catch our breath. My head turns to the side as he devours my neck. Licking, sucking, biting. It’s all so much and not enough. Our mouths collide again in a frenzy. Our hands roaming and touching. Under my shirt, his callouses against my side sends shivers rolling through my body. My nails drag down the muscles of his chest, loving the feel of his strength. His fingers grip my thigh, flexing and massaging. It sends a spark right to my center.

Then it hits me. I can’t go further with him until he knows. He needs to know, deserves it. He had the courage to tell me how he felt and I didn’t return the favor.

I pull away, my head slamming hard into my pillow.

His eyes dart over me, checking me out but this time not in a sexual way. He’s worried. “What’s wrong? Are you okay? Feel okay? Am I pushing you too much?”

“No. No, I feel fine,” I assure him. “A little tired, but fine.”

“Okay, then.” He pauses but I can tell he doesn’t fully believe me. He leans up on an elbow. “You sure? We can go to sleep right now.”

I shake my head and look him in the eye. “If you stop now, I’ll be forced to get violent. I want you, Beau. More than I’ve ever wanted anyone in my entire life. I’ve wanted all of you for a long time and that won’t ever go away. I know this because for the past several years, I haven’t been with anyone besides myself because no one compares to you.”

He lets out a feral growl and slams his mouth onto mine, twisting so he’s draped over me. His hard and strong body a welcome weight on top of me. His hands cradling my head. It feels so good to be touched by him. With him. In the way I’ve longed to be with him for so many years.

“Why did we wait so long?” he asks, lips against my skin as he kisses all over my face. My cheeks, tip of my nose, forehead, eyelids, ending, blissfully, on my lips, preventing me from answering. Not that it matters, because I don’t have an answer anyway. As far as I know, the only reason either of us wasted time not admitting to each other that we want more than friendship was because we were scared. Like idiots.

We lie on my bed, making out like a couple teenagers without the fear of being caught, rolling around and swapping positions. Me on top, him on top. Lying on our sides. Hands roaming everywhere they can. I’m on fire, heart racing and every pulse point in my body is pounding.

It’s perfect. Exactly how I’d always envisioned making out with Beau would be.

Well, aside from keeping quiet as to not wake up my daughter.

Holy crap.

My daughter is right down the hall.

What the heck are we doing!

Not that I want to stop, and the door is locked, but still… isn’t this inappropriate or something? Though, couples still have sex and are intimate with each other when their kids are in the house, right? I wouldn’t know because I’ve never been part of a couple while also being a mother. But I’m not even sure that’s what we are.

“What are we doing?” I ask, completely out of breath.

“Kissing.”

“No. I mean, what are we doing?”

“Making out.” He rubs the tip of his nose along my jaw. “Getting to know each other.” He massages and squeezes my breast. “Showing you how much I want you.” His talented lips move lower, lower, lower. Kissing me over the thin fabric of my tank top.

My back arches and I wiggle under him, needing more.

So much more.

Everything.

“But to ease your worries, we’re together. I should have told you how I felt but everything felt complicated and wrong. And it might seem like we’re skipping steps here, but we aren’t. Not really. Because the way I feel for you isn’t new or out of nowhere. It’s been there all along. I was just too scared to do something about it. If you didn’t feel the same way, or if it didn’t work out… fuck, Addy. I can’t lose you.”