Page 64 of The Path To Us

Fuck, that was scary. I still can’t believe that happened just last night. Less than twelve hours ago I was afraid I was going to lose her then I was tasting her for the first time. No wonder I feel a little emotional today. A lot of shit has happened in a short amount of time.

I help Zoey down and she takes a seat at the table, saying a prayer quickly before diving in for a couple sausage links. While she’s busy, I pull Addy aside.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

I give her a look and she rolls her eyes. “Fine,” she huffs. “That’s the first time she’s mentioned Chris since he died without it being sad. She was sharing a memory. A happy one.”

“That’s a good thing,” I remind her.

She nods her agreement. “It is, but you need to know, it’s because of you.”

“Me? No, Addy, she’s just…”

“She’s not just anything, Beau. You’re helping her to heal. By being here and being present in her life and showing her that Chris might be gone and that is going to be hard for the rest of our lives but that doesn’t mean we can’t still have a lot of good. And a lot of that good is because of you.”

A lot of that good is because of you.

Does she want me to start crying right here and now? Aside from when Chris died, I’m not typically a crier but hearing her tell me that Zoey’s heart is beginning to heal and it’s partly because of me? Yeah. That’ll bring any man to his knees in thanks that he’s been given the goodness he’s been given.

When I don’t respond, she continues to drive the point home. “And don’t think I am saying that you’re taking his place, because no one can. But you’re filling that void and not making it weird for her or uncomfortable. Because you love her and she feels it and sees it in the way you are with her. So her mentioning Chris in casual conversation and being ready to go to the pool because she wants to continue something he started and even eating more and for the most part sleeping better… that’s thanks to you being you.”

“Have I told you today that I love you?”

Even as her eyes grow soft, they still look fierce. “Have I told you today I love you?” comes her response.

“I think you just did in that speech you gave that almost made me start to weep right here in your kitchen while your baby girl is eating sausage sticks and hopefully killing off whatever animal died in her mouth while she slept last night.”

A laugh bubbles out of Addy and she covers her mouth, looking over at Zoey out of the corner of her eye. “It’s really awful, isn’t it? I’m a little concerned that there’s something wrong with her.”

I shake my head and smile. “I’m sure we can ask her dentist.”

She whispers, “We.”

I lick my lips and glance at Zoey quickly to make sure she’s still doing okay only to catch her watching us and trying to sneak a little piece of sausage to Macaroni. “Did I overstep?”

“No. It’s just that…”

“We did it backward, huh? I love you before dating and kissing and wooing.”

She laughs and bites her lip. “Wooing? Are we eighty?”

“Modern men woo their women and if they don’t it’s a shame.”

“Oh, is it?”

I nod and move to the table, sitting next to Zoey and taking a bite of the sausage she has in her hand.

“Unca Beau! Dat was mine!”

“Sorry, Squirt. Remember what your dad taught you? You gotta eat quickly if you don’t want me stealing it away. I eat a lot and never ever get full.”

She harrumphs and shoots me a glare that would be frightening if it wasn’t on the face of a five-year-old trying to look tough.

I hold up my hands in surrender before stabbing my fork into my own piece then holding it up to her. “Want a bite of mine since I took from yours?”

She shakes her head smiling before finishing the last of hers. “I’m not as big as you. I’m already full.” When she admits that she’s full, she almost looks pathetic with how upset it makes her.

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