Page 16 of Don't Leave Me

Billie suddenly appeared in my room, a smile wide on her face.

She raised her eyebrows playfully then sat on the bed with me. “You didn’t come home last night,” she teased.

I smiled and looked down at my hands. “No. I stayed at Michael’s,” I admitted, although I didn’t sound as excited as I wanted to.

“And what happened?” she asked curiously, obviously noticing my lack of enthusiasm.

I shrugged, almost feeling emotional. “We had crazy hot sex all night; it was amazing,” I smiled up at her.

She furrowed her brows. “Then why do you sound like you’ve just found out someone died?” she pried.

I sighed. “This morning he told me he didn’t like labels, right after he told me that he was happy with only seeing me. It’s confusing as hell and I want more than just sex,” I explained quickly, raising my hands in the air.

Billie paused, seeming to be in deep thought. “Did you tell him that?”

Of course. That would be the logical and simple thing to do.

“No,” I shook my head, embarrassed. “I was actually pretty passive aggressive about it. Classic Hana,” I quipped.

Billie smiled. “You should tell him how you feel, Han. If he doesn’t want what you want, then move on,” she shrugged.

I moaned and laid down. “I don’t know what I want! A part of me keeps saying that I want him in any way I can get him. And another part of me wants to make everything complicated and emotional,” I sighed.

“Classic Hana,” Billie teased as she laid down beside me.

I laughed and shook my head, wanting to change the subject.

“What did you do last night? John?” I raised an eyebrow.

Billie smiled widely. “Yes. I’m falling for the kid, Han,” she sighed.

I chuckled. “He’s a nice kid. And a lucky one too,” I nodded, putting my hand up to hers to hold it.

“Oh,” she perked up, leaning on her elbow. “You know who’s super into you? That Brit, Jack. He was at John’s last night for a while and was askingallabout you,” she smiled.

I sighed with a smile.Oh yeah…Jack. “I gave him my number Thursday night. Haven’t heard from him yet,” I shrugged nonchalantly.

Wait. He did call earlier this morning while I was at Michael’s - when he was snooping. I totally forgot.

“He’s shy. Give him a couple days. Or just come to John’s show with me tonight. They’re in a band together,” she suggested, excited about the idea.

I was suddenly excited as well.A distraction from my endless thoughts about Michael would be nice.

“I’m in,” I declared quickly before I changed my mind.

6

Chapter 6

The Brooklyn Theater was always my favorite hangout spot for when I was hypomanic. There were always an endless supply of hot hipster dudes with long hair and/or tattoos that kept me occupied for the night, a loud and rowdy energy from the bands that played, and a bartender with a heavy hand to keep me from getting too speedy. However, I was not hypomanic at the moment and started to feel a little claustrophobic in the tiny backstage area where I hung out with Billie and John and a few others, Jack and another band member not yet present. Billie was on my case about drinking, only keeping an eye on me and trying to keep me healthy and sane, but I was annoyed and tense while I hesitantly sipped on a vodka tonic. Billie eyed me with disapproval but that never stopped me.

“I have arrived,” a cute brown-haired hipster announced as he walked in, a beer in his hand.

“Adam!” someone exclaimed, getting up to give him a half-handshake, half-hug.

“That’s Adam, the Whip’s lead guitarist,” Billie said into my ear, keeping me in the loop.

I nodded, still looking around for my cute Brit.

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