Page 84 of Solstice

I didn’t let him finish. I turned on my heel, tears burning my eyes, and marched out of that bloody charade before I lost my mind.

“Bring me the child,”the king demanded.“Bring me my wife. Then I’ll give you what you seek.”

“I don’t have your bloody family,” I snarled, shoving into my apartments before slamming the doors shut. The staff must have thought I’d had a mental breakdown, and they wouldn’t be too far from the truth.

I didn’t know who to trust. I didn’t know what was real. I couldn’t even rely on my own memories. Panic seized my chest, overwhelming me as I melted against the plaster walls and slid down to the ground, allowing myself these few private moments to fall apart.

What did you do to me? What did I do to myself?

I couldn’t remember. But truth be told, whatever happened that night paled in comparison to how the king had violated meagain. He had entered my mind and distorted whatever he wantedagain.

How had he done it?How had he convinced me I was dreaming, that none of it was real? Or perhaps, I was still dreaming. Perhaps I had never woken up that day my parents died.

Bleeding Christ, I don’t know. I don’t know.

Why was I so vulnerable?

Go to them,a part of me said.We’re stronger together.

I quickly shut that down. I couldn’t even protect myself. If the king could manipulate my memories so easily, what else was he capable of doing to me?

No, it was even more important for me to stay away from my spouses now. To protect them. To protect us all. I didn’t know what was real and what wasn’t, but most importantly, I was a liability, tarnished to the very core.

My phone buzzed again, this time flashing Carter across the top of the screen. My thumb hovered over the answer button, but I didn’t have the strength to push it down.

Maybe one day I would.

Maybe. One day.

24

Ivy

TWO DAYS BEFORE THE WEDDING

The days went by with no sign of Siobhan, Finn, or Donnelly.

I didn’t hear from Miri. She was an adult; she could make her own choices.

And she hadn’t chosen me.

My heart throbbed, and I glanced down at the scars on my hand, the remnants of vows we made when we were younger and more naive.

Enough now.

I wanted to move past it. I wanted it to not hurt anymore. Hell, even I had started to pity myself. But…it just wasn’t right without her here. A few nights ago, I had gotten the courage to call her, knowing it would only bring me more heartache.

The phone had rang and rang while my skin crawled. It must have been 7 or 8 a.m. in London, certainly she was awake. A click had brought me back to the present.

“Hello?” My knees had crumpled under me, and I’d slumped to a couch. “Miri? Is that you?”

Nothing had come from the other end.

“Miri, please. I miss you. Say something.” Tears had burned my eyes and sobs had threatened to spill out of my throat. I’d shoved them back down into my chest. “Yeah, I get it. You’ll be okay…okay? Just hang in there.”

Still, no words had come from the other side, just the soft whisper of someone breathing. Was it her? Had it been some royal creep listening in?

“Miri, I love you. I haven’t forgotten my promise.” My murmurs had turned to whispers and, finally, to pleas. Hot tears had slid down my cheeks as I gave in to the angst building in my chest. “Please let me back in. We all miss you. We can’t do this without you, Miri, my darling. My love. Please.”

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