Page 72 of Saving You

When his lips leave mine, he holds me for a few moments, allowing me to absorb the feeling of safety I have when in his arms. When I’ve gathered myself, I wipe under my eyes and make my way into the living room where Charlie’s sitting, reading a book with Sarah. Max and Loraine sit on the couch talking, but I notice how he watches his wife, his gaze full of affection.

I walk up to Loraine and hug her before saying, “We should probably head home. I need to get her in a bath and ready for bed.”

She nods. “Okay, well, we will see you for Christmas dinner. Don’t forget what I said, either.”

“I won’t, thank you.” Looking over at Sarah and Charlie, I see they’re just about done with their book. “Baby Girl, when you two finish that book, it’s going to be time to go.”

She looks up at me, and I can see the tiredness all over her face, but she’s trying to be a trooper and stay awake.

“Okay, Mommy.”

When they finish, we all make our way to the front door.

“Thank you so much for having us,” I say to Loraine.

“You’re welcome whenever you’d like.”

“I’ll get your number from Caleb to set up the trip to Fly Over and the Christmas market,” Sarah says before pulling me into a hug. “It was so nice to meet you both. I’m happy Caleb was able to find you two,” she whispers in my ear softly.

“You too,” is all I manage to say through the lump in my throat.

Caleb has Charlie in his arms, and she’s almost passed out with her head resting on his shoulder.

“Thanks, Mom. I’ll call you before Christmas to confirm what we need to bring.” He leans in and kisses her cheek and then Sarah’s before shaking his brother’s hand and leading me out the door.

The drive back to the house is quiet. Music plays softly in the background while I stare out the window. Caleb has his hand on my thigh the entire time, his thumb moving softly up and down.

It’s hard to think that in justten short weeks I’ve gone from being a single mom with only myself and Lily to rely on to having this huge group of people who want me to rely on them. Who want to be in our lives. It feels too good to be true. I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop, for the world to spin on its axis and everything to go back to normal. The problem is, I don’t want things to go back to normal. I want everything to stay the way it is. I want these people in my life, in Charlie’s life. I want to come home to Caleb, a man who cares about me and my daughter. This is the life I want to build. But the ground has fallen out from under me before. I think if it happens again, I won’t be able to survive it the same way. I don’t know that I can put that shell around myself now that all these people have cracked and destroyed it.

Arriving home, Caleb carries Charlie upstairs, and I decide to skip the bath tonight and just tuck her into bed.

CHAPTER 26

Caleb

When we get home, I can tell that the day has been emotionally exhausting for Bailey. After tucking Charlie into bed with Finn cuddled at her feet, I head into our room and straight into the washroom to run her a bath. I pull out some candles I have stored in the bottom drawer, light them, and drop a lavender-scented bath bomb into the water. While the water runs, I head into the room and silently lead Bailey into the washroom.

Neither of us says anything as I slowly take off each article of her clothing then mine. I turn off the water and step into the bath, offering her my hand. She takes it, stepping into the bath in front of me, and we both sit. We sit in silence, her back to my front and the only sound the gentle sloshing of the water anytime we move.

The warm water and the feeling of her body pressed against mine has me completely relaxed. I could fall asleep right here, perfectly content.

After a few minutes, I feel her chest heave. Opening my eyes, I see her biting her lip as she tries to hold back tears. One arm holds her tighter while the hand of the other reaches up and brushes away a stray tear that’s fallen. I place gentle kisses on her temple and cheek, showing her my quiet support. Those kisses seem to break her because she stops holding the tears back and allows herself to cry in my arms. I hold her, allowing her to release all these pent-up emotions. She grips my arms tightly, and her entire body fully relaxes into me. As her sobs subside, I kiss her temple and whisper against her skin, “When you’re ready to talk, I’m right here.”

I watch the flickering of the candle lights and listen to her breath as it evens out.

Just when I think she’s fallen asleep, she says, “I’ve never felt this supported and cared for. It’s so much, it’s overwhelming.”

I don’t say anything, giving her the space to continue.

“When I was with Derek, I did everything around the house, even when I was pregnant. He didn’t come to any of the doctor’s appointments. He didn’t help decorate the nursery. I felt so alone despite being married and living with my husband. Then Charlie was born, and I was still left doing everything. Derek started coming home later, and that’s when the hitting really started. He swore up and down he loved me and it was my fault that he hit me. I wasn’t keeping Charlie quiet, wasn’t keeping up on the cleaning. I didn’t have dinner waiting for him every night. He was my first for everything. When we got married, I swore we were this great love story and we would spend the rest of our lives together. It was the broken bones that made me finally leave.”

I tense at her words. Picturing her in a hospital room with cuts, bruises, and broken bones has my chest burning. I close my eyes, lean my head against the side of hers, and take a few deep, steadying breaths.

When I’ve gathered myself I say, “That’s not love. I don’t ever want you thinking that’s love again. Someone who loves yousupports you. Protects you. Treasures you. You’ve found a family that will do all of that. Don’t question whether you’re worthy of it because you are, and so much more, Bailey. You deserve the world.”

She turns her head and looks at me. I lower my mouth to hers. I kiss her slowly, reverently, affectionately. She turns in my arms, the water sloshing around us as she straddles my lap. Her lips leave mine and trail my jaw, down my neck, across my chest, and up the other side. I groan as she takes her time, dragging her lips over my skin. She rocks against me, and I harden beneath her. I grip her hips, trying to get her to stop.

Her lips find my ear. “I want you,” she whispers.

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