Page 99 of Must Love Dogs… and Hockey

I jerk back and blink. Holy shit.

Chapter 20

Easton

I’ve lost everything. But it’s my own fault.

I’m sitting up here in the press box level watching Friday night’s game. I’m not playing.

I’ve lost Otis. Okay, that wasn’t my fault. I knew he was never going to be mine to keep forever, except…I guess I started to take it for granted that his owner was never coming for him.

I’ve lost Lilly. That was definitely my fault.

Not only that, I’ve lost my self-respect. There’s a big problem here, and I’m sitting around feeling sorry for myself instead of doing something about it.

I’ve thought a lot about Lilly and the things she said. I’ve also thought about the things she’s done. Because actions speak louder than words, right? She believed so strongly in something that she sacrificed a lot of things—her career, her reputation, her finances—to make things right. She lost a boyfriend, who clearly was a dick not worthy of her to begin with. But she stuck to her values and kept going.

She has every right to call me a coward. Because she’s the bravest woman I’ve ever met.

Missing her is like missing a piece of me, like an arm or a leg. I’m lost and lonely and pathetic. I miss Otis too, but not like I miss her.

I fucked up big time.

The crowd roars, the goal horn blares, and Goose and Larry on either side of me give silent fist pumps. (Nobody ever cheers in the press box.) I missed the goal. I rub my forehead. I should at least pay attention to the game. I could be learning something from watching up here.

I manage to focus for the rest of the game. It’s Friday night and a bunch of guys are going out, but I’m not feeling it, so I head home. Cookie joins me on the walk to the subway station and on the train ride. Guess he’s not feeling it either.

“Want to come for a beer?” I ask him unenthusiastically as we arrive at our building.

“Sure.”

Damn, I was hoping he’d say no, and I could be alone to wallow in self-pity.

“It’s weird with no dog here,” Cookie comments as we walk into my apartment.

“I know.”

“That was so bizarre.”

“Yeah.” I sigh. “No kidding.”

It turned out Jane Doe is actually Karen, and Otis’s owner is Dennis. Not Percy. Percy was Otis’s name.

Otis is a much better name.

Dennis, who’d only just moved into the building, had been working in Hong Kong for a few months and Karen was supposed to look after Otis (I refuse to call him Percy) but she found out that Dennis had been cheating on her with another woman in Hong Kong, and she wanted to get back at Dennis and get rid of Otis. After the elevator incident she was so flustered and freaked out she took the opportunity to bolt, leaving him with me. Dennis just returned from Hong Kong to learn that his girlfriend had basically given away his dog and he was pissed. They’d talked to the building manager and had found out my apartment number and were on their way up to see me when I ran into them.

“I guess. Stealing him back probably isn’t an option, huh?”

“I considered it.” I grab two beers from the fridge.

“Did you consider not giving him back?”

I hand him a beer. “Yeah. But what could I do? I always knew he wasn’t my dog.”

I’m trying to pretend I’m not dejected about this, but I know that Cookie knows I’m totally faking it.

In the living room, I lose my suit jacket and tie, remove my cuff links, and roll up the sleeves of my shirt. “Ah. That’s better.”

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