Page 71 of Crash & Burn

I keep looking at her shoes, afraid that my whole fucking face will turn red if I look at her now. She is wearing light washed jeans with rips that show off the silky skin of her thighs. Her legs haunt my dreams after feeling them near me when she fell asleep in her hotel room and wrapped around me in her sleep.

She still has that T-shirt of mine that she wore that night, and I go to sleep every night hoping that she’s wearing it to bed.

Tonight, she’s wearing a tiny baby pink tank top that shows off her bronzed skin on her arms and just above the waistband of her jeans. Her blonde hair is in soft waves resting on her shoulders, and she makes my mouth water. The pink of her top perfectly matches the hue of her lips, and my brain short circuited when I saw her staring at me from that high-top table.

Even though I’ve seen Mia plenty over these past three months, tonight feels different. There are seven other people in this bar, all wrapped up in their own conversations, and I feel like it is just me and her, especially when she looks at me like I’m worth something.

It reminds me of our night in the hotel.

“I just hope you—and everyone—like it.” The “everyone” part is a little too delayed, and I want to punch myself in the face.

“Everyone will,” she reassures. “Sad we didn’t get to have any more road trips.”

“I know. Had our Kit Kats and Twix ready to go too.” This makes her laugh, and my heart warms at the memory of our first road trip when we shared our gas station snacks with each other.

“Maybe next summer, when you guys are on your big tour. I’ll have our true crime podcast ready and downloaded too,” she says, and my head whips up to her, not being able to hide the surprise and slight drop of my jaw. Another fucking podcast where I have to hear about the most disgusting excuses of humanity. This girl is lucky I can’t say no to her.

“Kidding,” she laughs. “My ‘Songs to Scream in the Car” playlist has been updated and is eagerly awaiting its launch though.”

“That sounds more like it,” I say, letting out a sigh. Watching Mia sing in the car all those months ago has been on replay in my head. I can’t drive and listen to music without wishing I was watching her on the passenger side. Mia is a music person through and through, and I love that side of her. I’ll never tell her, but I would have made it my life’s mission to make her fall in love with music again. Lucky for me, it was easier than I thought it would be. All she needed was a long car ride with the windows down.

I love that music and our love for it is something we have in common.

Talking to Mia right now makes me realize how much I missed her, and I have a hard time with that because she isn’t mine to miss.

She’s my friend, and I am thankful for that.

But if I was a better man, I could make sure everyone knew how proud I was to be hers, and I could spend my whole life showing her how much I need her to be mine.

Instead, I’m selfish, knowing I’m no good for her but needing her in my life any way I can.

Before I can say anything else, Annie bounces over to all of us, and I can tell by her face that she has an idea. Luke follows behind her like the puppy he is with her meaning they already kissed and made up—figuratively speaking, as far as I know—and she already has him on board for whatever she is about to say.

“Alright bitches,” she says, clapping her hands together. All the attention goes to her, and if I have learned anything in my years of knowing Annie, it’s that whatever is about to come out of her mouth is finite because this is her world. We’re just living in it. “It’s karaoke time.”

Chapter 24

Mia

Am I surprised that Annie is the type of girl to call all the shots?No.

Am I surprised that the only one grumbling is Emmett?

Also no.

I have been with these people almost daily for three months, and I have quickly picked up on the dynamic, finding my space within the group. Annie is a firecracker. She doesn’t take shit from anyone, and she’s the kind of person who will fight to the death for you.

Drew is more introverted and takes very great care of her social battery, but she is one of the most down-to-earth people I’ve ever talked to.

Emmett is the grump who actually is just a big teddy bear when you get to know him. Rightfully protective over Drew, and he is never afraid to say what is on his mind, even if it isn’t the most polite.

Then there’s Luke, the golden boy, always smiling, usually flirting, but always watching Annie.

Theo and Silas are more on the outskirts, friendly with everyone, but they aren’t as close to everyone compared to how they are with each other.

Then, there’s Eddie who has known Emmett forever, along with my brother, and he is the one no one ever has to worry about. He’s never the center of attention, always watching everyone else.

He never fails to be the center ofmyattention though.

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