Page 45 of Pucking Off-Sides With My Brother's Best Friend

I snort softly at his massive understatement. Jax is a royal pain in my ass most days, but even I can admit that living and working with him isn’t so bad. Yeah, it’s true, he never gave me any air to breathe when we were younger, but it helps that our schedules only overlap a few nights a week. I don’t think we would have fared quite as well if we werealwaysaround each other.

And I definitely wouldn’t have been able to keep my cool around Aiden if he were around all the time.

“Jax has actually been a pretty okay roommate,” I admit reluctantly. “I mean, he’s still absolutely shit at cleaning, and his cooking leaves a lot to be desired, but I’ve had worse.” I push open the door in front of us that leads to the locker rooms. It’s much quieter in this hall, and I pull them to a stop before weget to the main locker room corridor. Even family aren’t allowed down there.

“When you said you and Jax were moving in together, I was so worried though it would be a disaster. I mean, the way you abruptly left and changed all your life plans… well, frankly, it had me concerned maybe you were doing drugs.” I frown as I try to make sense of my mom’s words.

“Why would you think I was doing drugs?”

She glances at my dad before shrugging. “Well, who in their right mind does that? I mean you ended your engagement so suddenly and after so many years together. I understand having a bit of cold feet, but when he told us you returned the ring, I just felt so bad for Turner.”

Wait... what? Stabbing me in the heart would’ve hurt less than those words. What does she mean? She couldn’t understand why I’d left so abruptly?

She felt bad forhim?

Sure, I didn’t divulge every single reason for the abrupt end of my engagement, but surely, they had seen me upset enough to realize that whatever happened between us wasn’t good.

“I don’t think it’s something we should talk about right now,” I say, trying to keep the hurt from my voice. “This isn’t exactly the place to get into things. And anyway, it’s in the past. I’ve moved on, and so has he.”

I hope my words will be taken seriously, but that hope is in vain when Mom seems determined to continue talking about the same subject.

“I know, sweetheart, but I just think it would be better if we discussed it together so we can talk through everything and come up with a plan. I mean, we don’t want the same things to happen in your next relationship.”

She looks at Dad and I’m shocked further when he nods as if in agreement. “I think what your mother is trying to say is that we understand relationships are difficult. I mean, your mom and I haven’t always had it easy either, but we learned to work through it. Not like these new relationships that only seem to last until things get tough.”

“Things weren’t just tough,” I say, losing a little bit of my calm. It’s like being faced by the Spanish Inquisition.

I never thought I would have to explain the demise of my relationship to my family, so I never thought to come up with words. Now that’s coming back to bite me in the ass because all I want to do is make them stop talking about it and run the other way. I try to steer the conversation elsewhere.

“There were things that happened that I just don’t think—“

“What things, sweetheart? There’s no way that we can help if we don’t know exactly what happened. Your mother and I do have some experience in making a relationship and marriage work for the long term,” Dad says, cutting off my words.

Mom nods, seeming so sure that all that relationship needed was a few words and maybe a Band-Aid, but she doesn’t understand. I know that I don’t know the ins and outs of my parents’ entire relationship, but I’m pretty sure they haven’t gone through the same things as me.

I can’t see my father talking down to my mother for the most insignificant things. And I definitely can’t see my mom wanting to tear his self-esteem down until he felt like the only person who would ever love him was her. Those experiences are difficult to explain to someone who has never been in a situation like that before with the person they loved.

My parents are high school sweethearts. And even though Turner and I met in high school, their situation is so far removed from mine that I don’t even have the words nor the energy to help them understand fully.

“Mom, I don’t want to talk about this right now,” I say firmly. My voice shakes as I feel more of my good mood falling away. “Right now, it’s not about me. It’s about Jax and Aiden.”

“I know that sweetheart, but we can still—“

“Mom, Dad, what the hell?” My heart leaps into my throat at Jax’s voice. I let out a sigh of relief when he steps in front of me. From the corner of my eye, I see Aiden fall into line beside me before glancing over, eyes full of clear concern.

“Are you alright?” His voice soothes some part of me that I don’t have the energy to try to understand. I’m just grateful forthe pause to the previous conversation so I have time to gather myself.

Once I’m not in fight or flight mode, I can feel the quickness of my breath and the buzz in my fingers. I shake my hands, trying to rid myself of the feeling and take long, deep breaths to loosen the pressure in my chest.

I know the signs of an anxiety attack all too well, and the last place I want to have one is in public, surrounded by people I don’t know.

I can’t do this here. I don’t want to think about any of this.

A part of me wants to scream, to tell them everything—the put-downs, the constant criticism, the way he made me feel small. But another part, the part that’s still healing, can’t bear to see the pity in their eyes. How do I explain that the girl they raised, the one they thought was strong and independent, let herself be worn down to nothing?

How was I going to tell them that their perfect future son-in-law was anything but perfect? The words stick in my throat, choking me.

“We just wanted to know how we could help with—“

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