Page 57 of The Stars are Dying

Lilith diverted. “Your wears are of impeccable design. Though I apologize—your dress might not be salvageable from the damage.”

I wouldn’t normally care for something so petty, yet my mind wanted me to suffer the punishment, feeling broken with the news, knowing Cassia had purchased the dress for me.

“Oh, it’s no matter!” Lilith chirped at my sadness. I wanted to smile. She deserved it, and I admired her positive company. “We have plenty here. I’m sure we’ll find you something. Come!”

Everything in me cried out in protest for me to lie back down, but I couldn’t take advantage of her hospitality. I had to move on, though I had no idea where I would go. Nothing physical could touch the crushing weight of what was turning my body to steel. The effort to draw my legs up, to stand, became my penance for still being alive.

Lilith watched me with a falling expression until our eyes met and she beamed as if I wouldn’t notice her pity. What I greatly appreciated about her was that she never asked what kept me so despairing.

I followed her mindlessly into another room, which turned out to be the biggest closet I’d ever stood in. I found temporary distraction in the clothing that had always fascinated me. There were countless dresses in here, but I gravitated toward the back, where a beautiful outfit was displayed on a mannequin.

“My mother is a fighter,” Lilith said, pride coating her voice as she came up beside me. “She competed in the trials to be the Selected.”

My gaze snapped to her, and she delighted in my interest. “Where are your parents right now?”

“They were personally invited to the Keep for the send-off by Reigning Lord Reihan.”

I had to take a few deep breaths through my stab of grief.Stars, the thought of Reihan’s agony when Calix would take Cassia’s body back made my head pound.

“You did not go with them?” I asked.

Lilith played with a strand of her green hair as if it went with her answer. “They do not like me being in public. My mother is human, but in binding her life to my father’s she extends her years. My father looked like me once. Some fae can blend in with the humans far easier, and my father…” She flinched, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “He cropped his ears many years ago and files his horns to disguise himself. His green hair could easily be the result of a human consuming Starlight Matter.”

I was impacted by the revelation, sickened by the measures her father had to resort to just for a breath of freedom with his wife.

“I once thought I could do it too, but…it’s unimaginably painful. His horns grow back, and he must do it again at least twice a year. His ears had to be cut continuously for weeks as they tried to heal themselves too fast. The points got shorter and shorter, and with some healing enhancements they are now as rounded and smooth as a human’s.”

I didn’t realize my hand had covered my mouth with the tale. I couldn’t fathom the beauty of Lilith’s fae attributes being so barbarically removed out of desperation.

“You should stay here a while longer. At least until my parents are back. They will know how to help get you home safe.”

I had no home. No one waiting for me. “Thank you, but I must leave today.” I wouldn’t be their burden. I turned to look back over the garments.

“I think Cassia Vernhalla will win the Libertatem for us. Then we’ll be free to wander as we please without fear.”

The room swayed. My fingers flexed against material as I caught myself on a shelf.

“Are you still unwell?”

I had been so selfish in my grief and what Cassia’s death meant to me that I hadn’t considered the damning fate of so many others. An entire kingdom. With their Selected gone…

“What happens if the Selected never makes it to the Central?” I asked with cold trepidation.

Lilith frowned. “Their kingdom’s borders would be locked immediately. No citizens would be allowed to leave or choose another candidate for their realm to possibly win immunity.”

My eyes closed as my vision peppered, and I crouched slowly until my knees met the carpeted floor. Lilith took my arm to help, her concern growing.

“I’ll get you some water.”

I took hold of her forearm. She searched my eyes, and I could only imagine the dread in mine.

“Your mother—” It was the first conclusion I frantically drew. “Could she take the Selected’s place now?”

The slow shake of Lilith’s head made my hold on her drop. I stared at the ground, overcome with the kingdom’s heavy loss. We were condemned, without a glimmer of hope, to be at the mercy of the vampires for another century.

“The king would not allow it. The Selected’s profiles are already circulating, and it would be unfair to those making the choice right now whether to stay in their kingdom or choose another— Astraea, are you all right?”

I couldn’t answer while my mind buzzed. I vaguely felt Lilith slip away from me and exit the closet. My eyes drifted up. The ensemble I was kneeling before stood powerful and beautiful, in some ways with the elegance of a dress: a bodice that hugged tight, material that crossed at the neckline to give a V shape. The cut in the skirts on each side reached right to the thick, intricate belt, and I imagined the fitted combat pants that would go with it. Decorative but with some small slots for daggers, I assumed.

---