Page 123 of All I Want for Christmas

‘Scandi winters.’ He stopped by the prep table, unusually quiet.

Things had become stilted between them again now that her reason for being here had been satisfied. ‘...Back home, that would be enough snow to have all the trains cancelled and flights grounded.’ God. Small talk.

‘Mm.’ He looked away, his hands in the back pockets of his jeans, and she took it as the cue that he wanted her to go. It was his Saturday afternoon...

Her boots were by the back door and she walked straight over to them, pulling them on. She saw her jacket in the boot room and put that on too, wasting no more of his time.

‘You don’t want another coffee?’ he asked, mannered as always, watching as she readied herself to make a swift exit.

She didn’t look at him as she zipped up the jacket. ‘Thanks, but I really should get out of your way. I’ve already taken up too much of your Saturday as it is.’

‘It’s fine.’ So polite.

‘There’s a train at twenty past, so –’ She saw on the kitchen clock that it was ten to three.

‘Yes...I’ll drive you to the station.’

‘No,’ she said quickly. ‘There’s really no need. I’ve got my bearings and the walk will do me good. This is the second Saturday on the trot I’ve missed my run, so...’

‘Right.’

She glanced at him but, ever since his withdrawal at the lunch table, he had scarcely looked at her. No more teasing, no more jokes. Nothing personal. She sighed. Not just shut out but locked out. ‘Well, thanks for letting me visit here. I appreciate it.’

He shrugged. ‘I didn’t do anything. I can’t see what help it’s been for you.’

‘Oh, but it has. It’s been useful being able to see where Lilja was living when the portrait was painted. It all helps build up a—’

‘Feeling?’

She smiled at the tease. ‘Exactly.’ She swallowed, her hand reaching for the doorknob. ‘...Well, I guess I’ll see you at the next friendly meeting.’

It was her turn to tease, but he didn’t smile as she opened the door.

‘Bye, Max,’ she mumbled, walking out.

‘– Don’t.’

She looked back in surprise, her feet straddling the threshold. She was half in, half out. Caught. ‘What?’

‘Don’t go.’

‘But the train...’

‘Miss it.’

She blinked. ‘I have no reason to stay here now.’

‘...You do. You know you do.’ His voice was strained, though whether it was from the words he was saying, or those he wasn’t, she didn’t know.

‘But you said—’

‘I think we can agree it’s not working,’ he said brusquely. Still Max the Lawyer.

He clenched his jaw, looking stricken as the silence stretched. If she couldn’t speak, she also couldn’t move; she couldn’t even look away from him.

‘...Stay with me.’

They were straightforward words, but not for him. Not for a man who kept everyone at arm’s length. He’d spent the past few weeks constantly repelling her and pushing her back, but it had only made the tie between them grow ever more taut.

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