I take a deep breath and tell him the whole story of how my mother died. When I finish, I bite my lip and wait for him to speak.
“Kitten…I’m so sorry. I…wish you would have said something earlier. That’s a big burden to bear on your own.”
“Brix knows, and my grandparents.”
He pulls me into an unexpected hug and kisses the top of my head. “You know that’s not your fault, right?”
“Yes, it was,” I state.
He lets go of me and cups my face in his hands. “No. It wasn’t. You were a little girl. You shouldn’t have had to fend for yourself. You shouldn’t have even had to look for food.”
I feel the tears threaten to fall, and I close my eyes. “Kent, it’s fine. I caused the fire, and she died. End of story. It was a long time ago. It’s my albatross to bear.”
I feel his thumbs wiping away my tears as I open my eyes. “Tabby, it’s not your fault. Did you tell her you found food?”
I think back trying to remember. “I…maybe…I don’t remember.”
“So, say you said, ‘I’m making soup,’ then she knew and should have checked on you. It’s her fault for not getting her ass off that sofa. For popping painkillers instead of caring for her little girl.”
I blink back tears as I try to remember what I said. “I should have tried to get to her.”
Kent shakes his head. “No. You would have died, too. You’re here for a reason. Make the best of it. That’s what you should do.”
I’m not sure what about that statement gets my wheels turning, but it does. “I have an idea,” I state, my tears starting to dry up as the wheels in my head begin spinning.
Kent raises an eyebrow. “Oh?”
I nod. “I need to talk to Walt.”
“My manager?”
I nod again. “He mentioned that he thought my photos were good publicity for the team and to reach out if I was interested in working more with the marketing team. I want to do team photography, but with the kids from the hospital. If I can bring joy to one of them, maybe…this is silly, but maybe I’ll feel better. Like I paid it forward, somehow? Am I making sense?”
Kent laughs. “Yes, perfect sense. And I love that idea. I’m sure all the guys would love to do photos with the kids. You know I will.”
“You will?” I say so hopefully it almost sounds silly.
Kent looks seriously at me. “Of course, kitten. For you, anything. I love you, Tabby.”
My heart skips a beat every time he’s said that to me. His eyes search mine, and all I see in them is the truth. He loves me. I seriously think the grin that forms on my face might split it in half. I launch myself into his arms and kiss him.
“What’s that for?” he murmurs against my lips.
I giggle. “For being you.”
We finally eat the picnic, and as I look around, I decide we need a puppy.
“Let’s get a puppy!’ I declare.
“Uh, what?”
“A puppy.”
“Uh, nope.”
“Come on, you know you want one. You clearly grew up with them, and I’ve never had a pet. I need a puppy, for real. This has to happen.”
“Nope.”