Page 43 of Just A Little Fling

“It must be hard on your family to not be sure how far the decline will go.”

Usually, when someone offered me sympathy, I felt crowded and hemmed in, but with Babbo, it wasn’t confining. And that scared the shit out of me. The red lights flashed.

“It is,” I said with finality. “Back to our lists… Are you finished?”

Thankfully, Babbo let the subject drop and didn’t say anything more when he handed over his printout. We munched on our sandwiches and read quietly. “What’s up with little stuff being checked off?”

“It’s what I want to try and what I know I’m cool with.”

“But if you’ve never done it, how do you know?”

“Because I know me and what I like. What I missed the most with my ex not being interested in age play was the caretaking. My job is all about picking up the pieces of other people’s lives. When I’m a Daddy, I’m not making the best of a shitty situation. I’m helping someone feel safe, happy, and secure. Where else in my life do I get to offer that?”

“Nowhere?”

“Exactly, nowhere. And…” He paused dramatically and leaned forward. With his finger, he beckoned me forward to mimic his move. “I already know I like it because I did it yesterday with you.”

Details, details.

His last comment shut me up, and I went back to reviewing his list. As a Daddy and middle, we were pretty close, and the stuff he wasn’t into weren’t dealbreakers for me. The little stuff he was open to trying was a little more extensive than mine, like wetting. That hadn’t ever crossed my mind. So maybe not yet. Maybe not ever.

“Is wetting something you’re into?”

“I haven’t been, but I’m not opposed to it. I have some friends who really like it.” He glanced down at my list, “No-go for you?”

“I’ve never done it.”

“Hard or soft no?”

“Hard maybe.”

“I’m not asking for any kind of commitment, but I am asking that while we’re doing whatever it is we’re doing, we aren’t sleeping with other people.” Oh. Babbo was laying it out. I tried to keep my grin, but I was worried we’d veered into difficult territory. I needed to steer away, but I wasn’t sure the new direction would be any better.

“So you don’t want me to go out?”

“I don’t care about that, but I don’t want you to have sex with someone else while you’re there. It’s a safety issue for me.” I watched Babbo with masked eyes and his gaze was just as guarded. I had no idea—none, zilch, nada—what he was thinking.

“And if I want to?”

“Give me the courtesy of a heads-up.”

I sat back in my chair and looked at him with what I knew was a reserved expression. The doubt that I could do an undefined, casual but somewhat exclusive situationship was written all over his face. And I had the same reservations about him. Babbo was a man who believed in commitment.

“All right,” I answered, but then I looked everywhere but at him. In desperation, I shredded a paper towel I’d grabbed earlier, then stacked and restacked the pieces like minuscule blocks.

“What do you want this arrangement to look like? Beyond casual, I’m not entirely certain,” Levi asked.

My napkin ripping intensified, and the stacks became more precise and regimented. Clearly, I had thoughts, but I struggled to express them. I opened and closed my mouth several times before I took a deep breath, blew it out harshly, and answered, “Rules. I want rules.” That might’ve been the last thing he expected from me. “And spankings. Regular ones.” That one he probably saw coming.

I’d given this man an impossible task. Somehow, I wanted rules while simultaneously wanting to avoid feeling suffocated and trapped. Oh, and while he was at it, if he also kept it completely casual, that would be great.

Finally, he answered me with, “We can do that, but I want to think about it some before I offer them.”

“That’s fair, Babbo.”

“I want to do right by you, Sweet Boy.”

It had been too long since he’d touched me. When Babbo leaned forward, I matched his move, and we met in the middle. If this was a sign, no matter how small, I’d take it. His mouth settled over mine, and my lips parted with a sigh. His tongue swept into my mouth and claimed control. I followed his lead.

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