JAKE
I'm able to book the last seat on the last flight out of Atlanta to Boston, but once again, inclement weather delays my trip to my girl. Due to thunderstorms across the east coast, I don’t get out of Georgia until 7 am on Saturday morning.
Tash was not aware of anything going on with her sister, but an hour later, she did confirm Sandy’s car was parked in her driveway when Sandy should have been at work. The only information I got from Tash after that was that Sandy wasn’t hurt, but I needed to come and talk to her for myself.
My calls, so many that I can’t even assign a number, all went to voicemail. My text messages went unanswered. I had no choice but to cancel my dinner with the Montgomery family and head home on the next available flight.
The relief I felt when Tash told me Sandy was okay has been replaced with anger, and if I’m being honest, hurt. But I refuse to think about any of that now. I need answers, and whatever she has to say, she’s going to have to say it to my face. I know she’s expecting me, but she’s not expecting me until tomorrow. Too bad.
The only good news is that the flight lands a little early and I’m able to maneuver my way to the parking garage in no time. Traffic is light, and in just about thirty minutes, I’m pulling into Sandy’s driveway, where I park behind her car, intentionally blocking her in. Her door is locked, so I make use of the key she gave me a few weeks ago.
As always, the house is tidy, but her blinds are down, and despite the bright sunshine outside, I’m shrouded in darkness the minute I close the door behind me.
“Tash, not now!” She sounds tired but irritated. “I can’t discuss this with you again. I’m exhausted, and I need to save my strength. Jake will be back tomorrow.”
Just like the last time I walked into her house unannounced, I remain quiet, waiting for her to give me any clues as to what the hell is going on.
“And like I told you last night, I’m not hungry. I don’t want any damn food. I just want to be alone.” Her angry words towards her sister just fuel my rage. I take the stairs two at a time and walk into her bedroom. The blinds and the curtains are drawn, blocking any sunlight. Her back is turned towards the door and she’s covered her entire body.
“I can’t do this right now, Tash. I’ve had a shitty week. Have you ever been made to feel like shit because you love Chris? No, you haven’t. You’ll never understand. Please, give me some space. Just give me today.”
“It’s not Tash.”
She jumps out of the bed as if it’s on fire. When she faces me, I don’t see my Sandy. I see a mess. She’s in drab, gray sweats. Her hair is all over her face. Her eyes are red and puffy, and her sweatshirt even has a stain on it. I’ve only ever seen her perfectly put together, never like this.
I take a step forward, to take her into my arms and soothe whatever’s bothering her, but she takes a step back. “What are you doing here? I was expecting you tomorrow, not today.” She attempts to run a hand through her hair, but it’s so tangled, she gives up.
Unlike the rest of the house, her bedroom is not in pristine order. There are crumpled up tissues, scrubs, and half empty water bottles everywhere.
“I can’t get in touch with you for days, and you have to ask me what I’m doing here? Your phone’s been off since yesterday morning. You didn’t go to work, and I find you in here living like a damn vampire, and you act surprised to see me. What the hell do you think I’m doing here, Sandy? What do you think I would do when I can’t get in touch with you?” My voice gets louder with each word I speak. By the time I finish my speech, I’m standing in front of her. I want to touch her. I don’t think I’ve ever gone this long without touching her.
She averts her gaze and attempts to pat down her hair.
“I’m not ready for you right now. I thought I had another day.” She tries to walk past me, but I grab her wrist.
“Well, too bad because I’m here. What’s going on? I deserve more than this. I deserve more than having my calls ignored.”
“I haven’t been ignoring your calls, Jacob.”
“Don’t,” I hiss.
“Don’t what?” She asks.
“Don’t Jacob me. You only call me that when you’re pissed or when you’re about to get fucked. We’re not about to fuck, and you don’t have the right to be angry at me right now.”
“I’m not angry at you. I’m angry at the situation. I had one more day. One more day! I’m not ready to deal with it right now.” She’s frantic. She darts past me and runs down to the kitchen. I’m right behind her, grabbing her elbow and forcing her to face me.
“Ready or not, you’re dealing with it. Whateveritis, you’re dealing with it right now, Sandra.”
“You said you had to go to this dinner tonight. You just bailed?”
“I did. You’re more important.We’remore important than some dinner. I thought—”
“We’re moving too fast,” she interrupts me, talking so fast, it takes me a second to figure out what the hell she's saying.
“What?”
“We’re moving too fast. We’re together all the time. I’m expected to go to all your family things. You want me to go away with you. It’s just too much, Jacob. We haven’t known each other long, and we’re too different.” Before she finishes speaking, she turns her back to me, but not soon enough for me not to see the unshed tears in her eyes.