Page 192 of Lady of Ashes

“You were right, you know. I may have been raised as nobility, but it is still very different from being royalty.”

Callan tensed beside her. “Do you still wish to call off our arrangement?”

“No, Callan,” she said softly. “I do not wish for that at all.”

Relief ?ooded through him, and he felt his entire body relax at her words. “Tava?”

“Yes?”

“I see you, Tava. I just … want you to know that I see you. You are not in my background. You are not a spirit that blends in. I see you. I apologize that it took this long to do so.”

Tava had stilled beside him. After several seconds of silence she asked quietly, “Is this still a ruse, Callan?”

Always to the point. Always so observant. And if he were being honest, this hadn’t been a ruse for weeks now. Maybe Eliza had been right when she had told him Scarlett had been an obstacle preventing him from moving forward. Maybe with her gone, he could see what had been right in front of him for years. She was just as brilliant as Scarlett. She was more compassionate, more caring, and instead of luring him into shadows, Tava called him to the light.

“No, little fox,” he ?nally answered. “I do not think it is.” He waited for her to reply, and when she didn’t say anything, he said, “I do believe you ?gured out it stopped being a ruse well before I did.”

“I do not wish to be a replacement for her, Callan,” she said softly. “I do not wish to be some consolation prize. That is worse than not being seen.”

Callan straightened, turning to face her. He took her face in his hands. “Please do not think that.”

“You loved her, Callan,” Tava replied, her eyes ?lled with a sad sort of acceptance.

“But I do not any more. Perhaps I never did.”

“You followed her to the Fire Court.”

Callan shook his head, refusing to accept that Scarlett was going to ruin this for him too. “She once said to me that I was in love with the idea of her, and I think she was right. She challenged me. She started to make me think differently. She started to open my eyes, but you? Tava,youtook the blindfold off. You showed me the things she would only tell me about.Youshowed me what I could be, what Ishouldbe.”

Tava swallowed thickly before reaching up and removing his hands from her face. “I think you should go, Callan. It has been a long night. Emotions are high. We can talk tomorrow if you wish.”

“I wish to speak with you every day, Tava. I wish to never go a day without speaking to you again.” Her cheeks ?ushed slightly, but she started to push to her feet. Callan quickly got to his own so he could help her up. When she went to pull away from him again, he squeezed her ?ngers, halting her. “I am not saying I am in love with you, Tava. Do not think I have simply thrown myself into something new to avoid whatever it was Scarlett and I were.”

“Then what are you saying, Callan?”

“I am saying I want to try. I want to try making this ruse real and see where it goes,” he answered, stepping into her, her head tilting back to look at him. “You do not need to decide right this moment,” he went on when she hesitated. “You have dealt with enough tonight. When you decide, let me know. Yes?”

“Callan, I …” Her eyes darted to the side for a moment before settling back on him. “I was not expecting this. This was not part of the plan.”

“Maybe the plan was shit from the beginning,” he said, and Tava huffed a laugh. His eyes dipped to her mouth at the sound.

“Perhaps it was, your Highness,” she conceded. “I will consider it.”

CHAPTER 40

SORIN

“Somehow I pictured working with the Wraiths of Death to be different,” Cyrus said from atop his mare beside Sorin.

“I am somehow not surprised,” Sorin replied.

“Tell me again why we are going in on horseback instead of using your super fancy disappearing and reappearing trick,” Nuri was saying from atop a brown and black spotted horse.

“Because I can only use that if I know where I’m going. We don’t know where the Contessa is,” Scarlett bit back, her black horse huf?ng and pawing at the ground in agitation. “And before you ask, we’re not using portals because the Contessa does not know we are coming. We do not wish to create another unnecessary con?ict by showing up unannounced and uninvited.”

“And tell me again why Juliette isn’t using her super special vision to just see where we need to go?” Nuri drawled like she was bored out of her skull.

“Because it doesn’t work that way,” Juliette returned icily.

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