Page 80 of The Filth Kings

It had been hard to recognize exactly who the hell I was since I left his house the next day after the powerful threesome we had with Maylee. It felt like I belonged there when I shouldn’t have felt that damn way at all. I shouldn’t have wanted him. I knew that much. At the same time, I wanted Detavio to want me. Didn’t make sense and that’s what angered me. There was something so raw, so untamed, that pulled at every part of me.

His darkness was magnetic, it wrapped around me like smoke, slow and it suffocated me. A man like Detavio screamed trouble, touch and get burned at your own damn risk. I should feel repelled and know better, yet, the quiet parts of my mind wanted it, I wanted him. I wanted all the things that came with him but was scared to embrace it. Why the hell did I want a man like Detavio? The adrenaline he gave me was like the best high that I’ve ever felt besides smoking weed.

I couldn’t help the way my body responded to him even when I was in fear of him. His icy stare was a permanent promise, but not a safe one of all the wild and filthy things that he would do to me. I battled hard on not calling him or even popping up at his house just to lay eyes on him. He was obsessed with me and had no shame. I was obsessed with him but there was shame that crept inside of me whenever I thought about him.

A sane person would run for the hills, far the hell away from him. I wasn’t some reckless girl that gave in to every fine man that fell in my view. For Detavio, I felt reckless, it took one moment in his bed to discover just how far I’d go. The more I tried to deny my own thoughts, the stronger the pull that he had on me became. Like a riptide, I felt helpless to the currents beneath the surface of him.

“I told myself that I didn’t want the chaos that he had to offer. I’m better than the whirlwind of trouble and emotions that he would possibly drag me into. I just can’t erase that cocky ass smirk…or him calling me a ‘Pussy’ or the icy look in his eyes that screamed he saw right through me. Detavio knows how to make me want something that I shouldn’t, and I hate it,” I said above a whisper.

Natavi’s mouth dropped wide open, she slowly closed it as I continued to get lost in my own thoughts of Detavio. Every part of me screamed to turn the hell away, but my heart and mind was too curious, too eager to taste the forbiddeness from him. I was torn, his name echoed in my mind when I didn’t want it to, and I couldn’t stop myself from craving him. What made me the most reluctant was me knowing that Detavio’s cocky fine ass knew that I was dreaming about him. He knew that I was over here having withdrawals. He wanted me to come to him, but I refused.I’ll make him come to me first.I told myself.

“He was wrong, and I think that he’s too much for you…I thought Monster was too much for me too until I realized that it was destiny. I told you how I washed Impurity’s blood off his fingers then fucked him all over the house afterwards. I did the same after he came home from killing Chedda?—”

“That’s where I draw the line! I’m not washing no?—”

“He sucks the soul out of each one of my toes…My sexy chocolate bar, devours me in the literal sense. Don’t sit here and say what yo hot in the ass wouldn’t do. It’s the delu-lu for me!” She rolled her eyes.

“Whatever, you just came up in here because you ready to get back to being devoured.” I giggled then laughed hard when her face looked guilty.

“Monster is outside waiting as we speak, I’m sure he’ll be knocking at the door in the next ten minutes.” She smirked.

“I love that for you, I really do. Although I think he’s a fucking psycho. Detavio bet not ever expect me to wash the blood off his hands after he kill somebody. Oh, my goodness, you’re just as psychotic as your man to even do that! It turns you on!” I sniggered.

“No, it doesn’t! Well, maybe a little bit!” She giggled nervously.

“Natavi, that shit turns you on a whole lot! You just said he sucks the soul out of your toes and fuck you afterwards!” I fell out and laughed harder.

My laughter subsided, Natavi smiled and grabbed my hands

“I know I’m laughing about it all now but at first, it scared me to death. I knew it was in his own weird way to reveal a side of him that he kept hidden from most. I had a choice to walk away…I couldn’t…Sometimes people walk away from the ones that pull at our heartstrings and it’s too painful to live without thinking about them…I didn’t want to be that person, I’m happy…never experienced a man like Monster but he’s mine like I’m his.” She smiled.

My front door sounded off like the police was getting ready to kick the door in. Me and Natavi looked at each other and giggled.

“Girl, get the hell out of my house and tend to your man so I can get back to dreaming of mine.” I joked but was serious at the same time.

“I love you…I’m going to ask you one more time…do you want to come with me and Monster to Detavio’s event?” Natavi ignored the loud beating on my door and looked over at me with hopeful eyes.

“No…if Detavio wanted me there…he’d come and get me himself,” I stated stubbornly.

“Okay, girl!” Natavi chuckled nervously.

“Lock the door on your way out, and don’t forget to call me tonight to tell me how it goes.” I smiled at her.

We embraced each other, and I watched Natavi hurriedly walk out of my room.

Thirty-Seven

Around twelve in the afternoon,I finally decided to go make me something to eat and get out of my bedroom. I planned on starting back up my blogging once I had one of my guestrooms set up as a secondary studio. There was so many things that I wanted to get back into like self-care. Going to the gym and planning spa days once or twice a month.

There was so much celebrity gossip that hit my email on a day-to-day basis. My supporters had grown restless waiting for me to make a post or blog about anything. I thought back to Detavio and his LGBTQ meta dating launch tonight. It would have been big if I could have went tonight just to blog about it the following day.

I stood in my floor to length mirror and smiled at myself. I had on pink Nike sweats and a white sports bra. My stomach damn near hung over my sweats, I traced over the stretch marks that decorated my stomach then flipped my fresh twenty-six-inch weave over my shoulders.

“I look damn good,” I said aloud as I grabbed a handful of stomach.

“So, you are crazy, talking to yourself in the mirror.”

I screamed at the top of my lungs then whipped around with my eyes damn near popping out of its sockets. My body went still as I fully turned toward Detavio. His eyes, dark and unreadable, locked onto mine. I swallowed a knot that formed in my throat. I hadn’t expected him to show up or even contact me. The air between us felt thick before he spoke.

---