Page 38 of Ordinary Secrets

“You mentioned that you guys moved around every year. Where do they live now?”

“They’re still in Brawley. After I graduated high school and came to LA, they decided to stay.”

“Are they retired?”

She takes a sip of her water. “Yeah. Gramps was a mechanic. Grammy stayed home with me.”

How odd.What kind of mechanic gets a new job in a different town every year? It’s not a career that requires traveling. That makes me think he was running from something. Question is: What and why? Then, once Arella moves out, all of a sudden, he’s done running? Something’s not adding up.

“If they liked moving around so much,” I say, “why aren’t they anymore?”

Arella shrugs like there isn’t anything more to this. “It’s not the moving they loved. It’s the living in different places. Theadventures. The new experiences. Since I was in school, they didn’t get to explore the world like they wanted to. Moving around the state was a good second option until I graduated. Now that I’m not around, they travel all the time. They’re currently in Alaska until tomorrow. In two weeks, they’re off to Brazil.”

I guess that’s a possible explanation. Still, I think there’s more to it. Either that or I want there to be more, so I’m looking for it.

Arella continues, “They get antsy when they stay in the same place for too long.”

I can relate to that. The minute I graduated, my uncle told me to get out and “find my place in the world.” I packed up the little I had, bought a car, and went wherever life took me. I’d stay in one city for as long as it suited me, then I’d pack up and do it again.

The longest I’ve lived anywhere since I left home is LA, and that’s only because of my band. I’d like to think I’ve found my place here, but if that’s the case, why do I always feel like I don’t belong?

The violinist finishes her piece, and the crowd erupts with applause. In the grass, a few couples swaying together mosey back to their seats. After some thank-yous, the violinist turns a page in her book, then returns the instrument to her shoulder.

“What about you?” Arella asks as another tune fills the air. “Do you like to travel?”

I’m not a fan of how she keeps spinning our conversations back to me. Talking about myself depresses me. Plus, that’s not the point of this dinner. “I do. I’ve been to lots of different places. How ’bout you?”

“I haven’t gone anywhere outside of California.”

That’s odd.How has a girl whose family loves to travel not been anywhere except this one state?

“What’s been your favorite place to visit so far?” Arella asks.

“Besides here, I lived in Spain and France the longest, so maybe those two.”

“Did you pick up the languages there?”

“Only conversationally.”

Her face lights up. “Have you ever been to Paris?”

“Of course.”

“Ah!” She throws her head back, swooning. “I’ve always wanted to go there. I’ve heard they have the best bakeries.”

Although I can’t sense it, I canseeher strong desire for Paris.Seeingher feelings but notfeelingthem is like I’m watching TV, where people are expressing emotions I can’t sense.

“Trey?”

My head jerks up. “Huh?”

“You got quiet all of a sudden.”

“Sorry. I was thinking.”

“About?”

I clear my throat, trying to think of a lie. Nothing comes to me, so I go with the truth. “You. Just wondering what you’re feeling.”