Page 46 of The Cowboy's Country Charm

“Did you talk about me and Rusty? You know we’ve just started dating, and I’ve only met her once.” Kristy was sure that Rusty’s family would weigh in about anyone he dated. They seemed close. And protective. Not that things were serious, of course.

“You really want to know?”

The pulse at her temple jumped. “Is it that bad?”

“No. Not at all. But, while she thinks you’re nice and pretty, she’s worried.”

“About?”

“That you’ll put your career before Rusty and break his heart.”

Kristy set her wineglass on the table. She’d never considered herself a heartbreaker. Quite the contrary. “He knows we’re just giving this a trial run. I do have to put the business before anything else, especially because of this Boots and Bells opportunity. He understands that.”

“I’m sure he says so. But she’s worried that he’s already, well,toointo you. And she’s afraid you’ll ditch him.” Her mother leaned toward her. “Should she be concerned?”

Kristy sat back against the sofa, feeling the need for support. “We’ve been out once. O-N-C-E. I like him or I wouldn’t have agreed to even one date.” And things would be a lot simpler if she hadn’t agreed. “So as long as he can handle playing second fiddle to this gala I’m in charge of and doesn’t show himself to be a weasel, why would I ditch him? Unless it’s to avoid getting the second degree after one date.” Maybe kissing him, being kissed by him, had been a mistake.

“But?”

“But I have no plans on getting serious either, least we forget the debacle with Dean.” Every time she thought of Rusty, Dean’s face appeared in the shadows, making it impossible for her to contemplate the future. And right now that was a good thing.

“Dean was a learning experience, but not all men are like Dean. From what I’ve gathered in my brief time with him, Rusty appears to be on the up and up. It’s clear he wants to be with you. And he doesn’t seem to care who knows it. And he’s charming.”

In the beginning, Dean had been all over her. And then, once they got engaged, it was if he felt his work was done and she wasn’t so special anymore. “Rusty already told me he’s not interested in getting serious.” Which made him perfect, at least in the short term. “You never know what someone is capable of. Dad did the same thing to you that Dean did to me.”

Her mom took a long sip of wine and set the empty glass on the table before speaking. “Well, that’s what I mean about there being a lesson that Jewel could teach women like me.

After Dean, she’d felt more sympathy for her mother than she had when she was twelve and her only wish was that her parents would stay together, regardless. “Like what?”

“Women like me, and maybe you, have looked at men, at marriage, as a stepping stone to the kind of life we want. Your father was an up-and-coming lawyer with political ambitions and the idea of being his wife, hosting parties, marrying a good breadwinner who could provide security, being able to raise children with all the financial benefits, not having to worry about surviving… well, that was very seductive.”

“You mean you didn’t love Daddy when you married him? Because that sounds very transactional.” Had that been how she’d felt about Dean? That he was a means to an end? Not a flattering appraisal… and something to think about.

“I cared about him. But if I’m being honest, and I owe it to you to be honest, I think I was in love with theideaof him, theideaof the life we could have together. And I wonder if that isn’t what you loved about Dean. He has ambition, he would be a good provider, you could build a family with him. The bottom line may have been what seemed most important for both of us. Dad and Dean were stepping stones to a destination, buttheyweren’t the destination. For Jewel, Ian was the destination. And once she reached that destination, then she could think about a future with him in it. He wasn’t just the stepping stone to that future. There was no future without him in it. Do you get the difference?”

Kristy crossed her arms over her chest as she mulled over her mother’s words. She had been devastated when she’d found out Dean had cheated on her. Angry. Hurt. Saddened. She had lost her future. The one that included a family.

“Maybe.” Although she’d never looked at it like that before. “But if you’re suggesting that to be happy I have to find a man that I would have to make sacrifices for because I want to be with him so badly, then count me out.”

Her mother slid closer. “Of course,hehas to be willing to make sacrifices to be with you as well. Ian gave up the rodeo to settle down with Jewel, so she was his destination as well.”

“So I have to give up a part of me in order to get my happily ever after? And the guy has to give up something or it isn’t real? That just doesn’t make any kind of sense. Neither of us should have to give up anything.” And something she wasn’t prepared to do for any man. “Like giving up the Boots and Bells gala?” Not happening.

Her mother shook her head. “That’s not what I’m saying. Just that the guy has to mean so much to you that you’d bewilling toin order to be with him. That you wouldn’t just be using him as a stepping stone to some fantasy future you wanted.”

“Why can’t I have the fantasy futureandthe guy without giving up anything?”

“Of course you can. But the man would come first. Just like you would come first for him. If it’s not reciprocal, it doesn’t work.”

“Seems a tall order and a fantasy in and of itself. I don’t know that I will ever feel that way about any man.”

“Hence Jewel’s concern.”

She’d finally decided to give in and date the guy, and it felt like she was already being given ultimatums. “Rusty’s not concerned. And as I said, he’s not interested in serious either.” That was what had made chucking her promise to herself possible.

“Still, when love hits, it hits.”

The Tina Turner song “What’s Love Got to Do with It” danced across her mind. “Can’t I just date someone without everyone rushing to marry us off?” Seemed a reasonable request.

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