Page 131 of Blackout-

She laughs softly and I swear the sound is even better than I remember. Maybe I don’t miss seeing her lying beside me the most. Maybe it’s her laugh I miss the most.

“A little bit,” she admits.

“I’m sorry,” I tell her as I try to pull my shit together. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m okay. The morning sickness stopped a while ago and I’m not so sure that’s a good thing considering I gained ten pounds last month. My doctor told me I need to slow down, but it’s like I’m always hungry.”

I smile at that.

“Your dad told me about the pizza cravings, and I’ve been trying to picture you eating a pie by yourself.”

“That pie didn’t stand a chance.”

Laughing, I comb my fingers through my hair and close my eyes as her voice continues to fill my ears.

“They told me you shaved,” she says. “I’ve been trying to picture that.”

“You don’t have to picture, Lace,” I say, opening my eyes. “You can come here and see it for yourself,” I add. There is no bitterness in my tone. It’s a simple suggestion…or maybe it’s a plea. I know I don’t got a right to ask anything of her and I don’t want to fuck things up but if I don’t say it, I’ll regret it and I’ve got enough of those to last me two lifetimes. “I don’t mean to push you. I just miss you.”

“I miss you too,” she murmurs. Silence fills the line and I become desperate for her voice. “Soon,” she adds softly. I never knew a single word could provoke so much hope in a person.

“I’ll be waiting,” I say.

Every day.

For as long as it takes.

Until the end of time.

I’ll wait.

“Thank you for sending the sonogram picture.”

“It’s amazing, isn’t it?”

“Amazing isn’t even the word,” I argue, wishing I had it with me. It would’ve been nice to look at while listening to Lacey’s voice. It would’ve made me feel closer to them and not worlds apart. “We created that,” I rasp.

“I still can’t believe it,” she admits

Me neither. Having a hand in making something so beautiful is mind boggling to me. I’ll never understand why God chose me to be this baby’s father, I can only be grateful for the blessing.

“So, what about you? How are you doing? Dad and Reina told me you’re making a lot of progress.”

“Yeah, it’s amazing what rehab can do for you when you actually make an effort. My counselor is a trip, though. She rides my ass and puts me in my place.”

“Sounds like my kind of girl,” she teases.

“You’d probably love her.”

“If she helps you, there’s no doubt.”

“If I tell you something, you have to promise not to tell a soul.”

“Cross my heart.”

“I’m serious, Lace, my reputation as a badass biker is at risk, here.”

I could give a fuck about my reputation or my street credit. It all means shit anyway. But that laugh she gives after I tell her that...I want more ofthat. So much more.

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