Page 71 of Jackal

From what she told me, they were a close-knit family that could be overbearing. I hadn’t spoken to either of my parents in so long, I wasn’t sure if they were dead or in jail. The club was my family, and we all knew each other’s business. I was in no position to judge her for keeping secrets from them, but parents and club business seemed different.

“Why don’t you just speak to them? The cat’s out of the bag, right? So may as well get it over with.”

She pulled back, her eyes looking up through her thick lashes, but there was no lust in them. No, this was all annoyance. “Jackal, you don’t understand. Forgiveness over permission was my plan. Now that they know before there’s anything to forgive,I have to beg for permission. You don’t get how my family is.”

“I hear you, Lil Bird. But you’re an accomplished woman. Woman being the operative word. You’re thirty with a bunch of initials behind your name.”

She let out a frustrated growl and stepped away, threading her hands through her hair. “Yeah, and in some families this wouldn’t be an issue. But mine,” she said, patting her chest as she turned back to face me, “isn’t like that. I’m not married. It’s not proper for me to live on my own. And Dad expected me to take over the practice. I can’t very well do that from here.”

Grabbing her shoulders, I eased her into her chair then knelt down, shielding the sun from my eyes. “I’m no expert, but wouldn’t it be difficult to take over his practice? You’re a Psychiatrist, not an internist, which he is, right?”

“Yes but–”

“And did you ever tellhimyou were going to take over? Or did he tell you?”

“Well, it’s just expected, Jackal. You don’t get it,” she said, lifting her arms in defeat.

I gripped the arms of the chair, leaning closer. “I’m trying to understand. Maybe they’re not mad you’re doing this. Maybe they’re upset you didn’t tell them.”

She blinked slowly as a scowl settled on her lips. “Again, you don’t get it. It’s just the way things are. And I’m not in the mood to deal with them right now. All they’re going to do is try to get me to come home.”

“And what if they did?”

Her brow furrowed. “What?”

“What if they did try to get you to leave. What doyouwanna do, Lil Bird? Deep down, do you think you should go back? Is that why you’re avoiding this?” Part of me wished I hadn’t asked. But knowing her family was important to her, I didn’t want anything to jeopardize that, especially me. And if she hadno doubts about what she wanted, why was it so hard to just tell them?

“Do you not want me to stay?” she asked, the scowl turning into a frown.

I grabbed her chin, lifting her deep brown eyes to mine. “If I could lock you away just for me, I would. If you leave, I don’t know what I’d do. I love you, Shivana. But I made a promise to Hawk and to this club. My life is here, and I hope that means with you. I wish I could say I’d love you enough to make up for your family, but I don’t know if that’s enough for you. I just want you to be happy.”

She blew out a deep sigh. “I wish I could have both. I wish I could be here and find an amazing job and we could be together. But I want to make my dad proud and my mom happy.”

“Do you not think they are already those things? You haven’t given them a chance to show you, to tell you, Lil Bird. Maybe they’d surprise you.”

Shivana let out a humorless laugh, running her hand through her hair again. “Well, being a researcher and living out of wedlock with a non-brown person isn’t their idea of accomplished.”

“Do you want to marry me?”

Her eyes went wide and her chest filled, but never went down.

“Breathe, Lil Bird.”

She shook her head. “Did you just–did you–what?”

“Shivana,” I said, taking her hand. “I’ve told you I love you. I’ve told you you’re mine. I may not be brown,” I said, cocking my head to the side, “but I’d take care of you and love you ‘til the end of my days, even beyond that. I know you’re not there yet, but I want you to know that I am. You don’t have to answer me now, but don’t say no just to annoy your parents, either.”

“What? I’m not trying to–”

“Shivana, you’re getting out all your rebellious shit in one biglump. Just like you said, you’ve been sheltered your whole life. I get it. Sow those wild oats. But you can be wild and still have it all. And I don’t think they’ll disown you for wanting your own life, but if they do, you’ll have me.”

“Seriously, when I said I wanted a biker daddy, this wasn’t what I meant.”

Leaning in, I parted her lips with my tongue, gripping the back of her neck to move her so I could kiss her hard and deep, just as she liked. Her hands went to my hips, balling my shirt as she mewled the deeper my tongue went.

“Okay, okay,” she said when I finally pulled away. “I’ll call them. But only after you take care of the fire you just started.”

Lifting her from the chair, she squealed then said, “Wait, my laptop. Grab the bag!”

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