Page 187 of Did They Break You

I feel the head of his cock against my entrance.

“You okay, baby?” he asks me quietly.

I nod. “Yes,” I tell him, meaning it. With him so close to me, his body over mine, I feel comforted.

He pushes into me, and I gasp, fingertips pressing further into the wall.

He groans, his head dropping to my shoulder.

Then his hand is fisted in my hair, and he yanks my head back as he fucks me harder. Rougher, his hips slapping against mine.

I whimper, my pulse racing. I can’t speak, the way my neck is arched backward, eyes closed.

“Fuck, you feel so good,” he groans, fucking me faster. A painting on the wall, just by the stairs, starts to rattle.

I’m trying to breathe, to be in the moment, but it’s all reminding me ofthat night.Not of Cortland, but…Chase.

I close my eyes tight.You’re okay. Everything is fine.

He fucks me faster, harder, and I hear the sound of our bodies colliding, bringing me back to that night.

“Cortland,” I manage to choke out, his grip in my hair painful, tears welling in my eyes.

“You want me to use you.”He’d said that in the truck. I meant it that night. I know he likes dirty sex, and I think I do too, but for some reason, with my fight with Sloane, him waking me up, taking me here in the middle of the night, that feeling of wrongness grows stronger, and along with it, so do the memories. That night is playing in my head on a loop. The way everything felt so numb after a while. Chase’s spit on my back. His cum, when he pulled out, spilling over me.

Cortland slows, nudging his nose against my neck, nibbling at my skin. “Yeah, baby?” He pushes into me, pulls out slowly, then pushes back in, never letting go of my hair.

“You’re scaring me.” The words come out barely more than a whisper.

I feel him tense behind me, still inside of me, still gripping my hair. “Why are you scared?” he asks quietly.

I take a breath, trying to relax, but I can’t.How do I explain?“I just… I’m sorry, it just…”

He pulls my hair tighter and I’m frozen as his mouth comes to my ear. “You want me to stop?”

I inhale. Exhale. My eyes are still closed, my throat pulled taut, the way he’s holding my hair. “I can’t stop thinking about…” I trail off, unable to get the words out.

For a moment, there’s only silence between us. I’m not sure either of us are breathing. Then he shifts his hips, pulling out slowly, then pushing back in, his mouth still on my ear. “Use your fucking words, Remi.” His grip is painful, my eyes watering at the pull. “If you want me to stop,say it.”

“Cortland, that’s not?—”

He pushes all the way in, causing me to whimper, nearly collapsing flat against the wall. I lock my arms to steady myself. “Say it.”

I shake my head, my scalp burning with his hold. I don’t understand why he brought me here. I don’t understand what the fuck is going on, and I don’t know why he’s being so cruel. “I’m just… I’m just confused.”

He laughs, his nose trailing down the length of my jaw, his tongue skimming over the side of my throat. “I wanna fuck you. What’s confusing about that?”

“You’re scaring me,” I manage to gasp out again.

He stills, his breath warm on my collarbone.

Then, abruptly, he lets go of me, pulling out, the heat of him leaving me.

He doesn’t say anything, and I turn around on trembling legs, bending down to pull up my underwear, my sweats. My hoodie and shirt are nowhere to be found in the dark, so I cross my arms over my chest as I lean against the wall.

He pulls up his own sweats, his shirt still on. Then he turns from me and I watch the muscles in his arm flex in the shadows as he swipes a hand through his messy hair, facing the living room.

“Cortland.”

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