Page 4 of Love at First Ink

The rest of the video call was Camilia catching Marisol up on every single part of her life. Which meant Camilia spoke animatedly about school. What she liked. What she hated. How sometimes the cafeteria food was good, and sometimes it was bad. She even spoke about what teachers were the nicest and which ones scared her a little.

Just as Marisol was about to become an expert on all things elementary school, she heard Lola’s voice come from somewhere out of frame. “Sweetie, go clean up your supplies from the kitchen table so we can eat dinner soon. Let me talk to Tía Marisol for a bit.”

“Okay!” the little girl said happily. She slid off her bed and smiled at the phone once more. “Love you!”

“Love you too, Bug.” Marisol smiled and was surprised to feel tears stinging her eyes. She didn’t even know why she was crying, but something about hearingI love youwith no strings attached was the best thing anyone had ever given her.

After a few hushed whispers and a shaky hand-off, her sister’s face took up the screen. Lola’s round face was smiling, though it was guarded, which was understandable. Over the past few years, their relationship had gotten better, especially after a year of therapy together. However, there were still things Marisol needed to work through before her sister could fully forgive her for the trauma she caused in childhood.

“Happy birthday, Mar.”

“Thank you,” she said softly, half wishing people would forget it was her birthday. She didn’t want people to feel obligated to talk to her just because she was a year older now.

“Do you have any plans?” her sister pried, sounding just like Alice. What was everyone’s obsession with wanting to know her plans today?

“I went to therapy.”

“Well, that’s good.” This time Lola’s smile was genuine. “I’m proud of you for going. I know it’s not easy.”

No, it definitely wasn’t easy. Unlearning how to be a terrible person was never easy and never fun. Too many times, Marisol left a crying wreck, and by the time she got her emotions under control, she felt exhausted. She was putting in all of this work, and for what? For people to congratulate her accomplishments, but then never make an attempt at becoming part of her life?

She supposed there were other reasons, but those weretougher to face. Like everything, it was easier to blame other people. Which was exactly why she was in therapy.

“So, what else? Surely therapy isn’t the only plan you have,” her sister asked again after a pregnant pause.

Without thinking through the decision to tell Lola, she blurted, “My therapist said I should get a tattoo.”

“What?!” Lola sputtered, eyes wide. Her reaction was almost comical, if it weren’t for the fact that Marisol was being serious.

“Well, I guess she didn’t specifically say I should get a tattoo. She said I should do something I’ve always wanted to do but talk myself out of,” she explained.

“And you’ve always wanted a tattoo?”

Marisol shrugged, feeling a little silly about it all. “I mean…yeah? I know it’s not proper, or whatever, but I think it would look beautiful.”

“I think so too,” Lola said, surprising Marisol.

“You do?”

Lola nodded. “Yeah, I love seeing Javi’s. We are planning on getting a couple’s tattoo soon, once we decide on what that will be. Do you know what you want to get?”

Marisol didn’t. She had only thought about the idea of getting a tattoo, not the actual tattoo itself. “I guess I haven’t made up my mind yet.”

“That’s okay.” Her sister shrugged. “Most places will have pre-drawn tattoos you can look at. Hey, how about I ask him if there’s a shop he prefers? We can set you up an appointment.”

“Oh, you don’t have to do that.”

There was a reason why Lola had never given anything of substantial value to Marisol, and that hung heavily between them. Marisol had not been a good sister. She was downright mean at times, to the point where Lola would run to her roomin tears as a child. Even as adults, Marisol had said and done pretty nasty things.

It wasn’t until Lola found Javi, and Marisol admitted she didn’t want to stay married to Archie that their relationship started to shift for the better. They were still healing and would be for a while. But little by little, it was getting better. She hoped one day they might even be friends.

“But I want to,” Lola said. “And, frankly, I don’t trust that you won’t chicken out and not schedule an appointment because you still think you need to please Mom.”

Anger bloomed in Marisol’s chest. Anger with Lola for chalking up her trauma to one simple thing, but also anger with herself because Lola was right. She didn’t actually think she would go through with it if left to her own devices.

“Okay, fine,” she relented easily. There was no point in arguing, and, frankly, she didn’t have the energy to.

Lola grinned. “Cool. Great. I’ll ask Javi, and then I’ll schedule you an appointment. You better go because I’m making this your birthday present from me. Or do I need to drive over there and take you myself?”

---