Page 102 of The CEO I Hate

“You’re damn right she does,” Jake said. His eyes were full of disappointment. “She gave you everything she had and you…you just slammed the door in her face.”

I wanted to argue, to tell Jake that things weren’t as simple as they seemed, but there was no defending myself when it came to Mia. Not now. Not after all the ways in which I’d screwed up.

“Do you know how shitty it was to see her break down over you? To listen to her cry herself to sleep on my shoulder?”

“I know, I’m sorry, man,” I said, my voice cracking. “I never wanted that for her.” My chest clenched, and I knuckled at the uncomfortable tightness. I hated the thought of Mia in pain, especially over me. I could imagine what Jake was thinking right now: I never wanted you for her.

Ash let out a quiet huff, his tail tapping once on the floor. It was barely audible, but somehow it still felt like a judgment.

I didn’t know if it was my tone or the utter look of despair on my face, but the tension in Jake’s jaw eased somewhat, his gaze softening a fraction.

“You’re lucky I’m in this chair right now,” he noted. “That’s all I’m gonna say.”

“You could probably still deck me if you tried.”

“You’d have to bend down,” Jake said. “Feels like a lot of effort, and I’m not sure you’re worth that.”

Pain surged through me. “I don’t know how to make it up to you, but I don’t want this to be the end of our friendship.”

Jake sighed heavily.

I slumped down on the couch, and we sat there in awkward silence for a long time.

“You’re an asshole,” Jake finally said, though his voice lacked the fiery anger from before. Now, he just sounded tired.

I nodded. “I know.” I picked up the resistance band he’d tossed aside and offered it to him again. It was a shitty stand-in for a peace offering, but it was all I had.

Jake seemed to realize that too, though he still refused the band.

“You still have to do your exercises,” I reminded him. And we both knew he’d have an easier time with them if someone of my size and strength helped him get in the right positions and provided enough resistance.

Jake grunted and took the band from me, and I helped him maneuver it beneath his left foot. I helped him stretch his leg out while he used the band to create tension.

“What’s all this?” I asked, nodding to the papers and massive textbook on his coffee table.

Jake glanced at the table. “I started the process to get my certification as a fire inspector.”

“Really?” I said, surprised but pleased at the news.

Jake tightened the resistance band in his hands. “Figured it was time I stop moping around here and get my life together.”

“All right then,” I said. “I’m glad to hear it.” Actually, I was incrediblyrelievedto hear it. I’d worried that breaking up with Gabrielle would have cemented Jake even further into inaction, that it would have set his recovery back weeks if not months as his depression deepened, but if anything, the breakup had the opposite effect.

I didn’t say it out loud, of course, but maybe Gabrielle leaving had been the best thing for both of them. Once he’d stopped being distracted by their complicated relationship, by trying to prove their love could last, he’d put his life back on track.

“What’s the process for becoming a fire inspector look like?” I asked.

“There’s a bunch of courses I have to do through the California State Fire Marshal’s office, then I have to pass an exam. I figure if I work through the course while I’m doing my PT, I might be ready to try for the exam by the time the surgeon gives me the all-clear.”

“And you’re…” I began. “That’s what you want to be doing?”

Jake’s eyes flickered briefly to the textbook and back, then he nodded. “It feels like a way for me to be a part of something that matters, even with all this,” he gestured to his wheelchair, “going on. I spent my whole career running into burning buildings, trying to save people. I need something that gives me that same sense of purpose without pushing my body to the limit every day. I’m not ready to sit on the sidelines, and I think this is a workable compromise. I can use my knowledge and experience, just in a different way.”

“That’s…Wow, man. It sounds like you’ve really taken a big step here.”

The corner of Jake’s mouth twitched, but he fought off the smile, doing his best not to show me anything that looked like warmth or friendship. But I took it as a win. And maybe I needed to take a cue from Jake and get myownlife back on track.

VeriTV was about to start post-production on season two ofEnd in Fire. Our other, ongoing reality shows were doing great, and we were in the early stages of putting together three more scripted shows. Our subscriber numbers were looking great.

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