Page 51 of The Sinners Touch

“You really think they would have come after me?” Angel’s emotions were rolling around, demanding to be sorted through, but all she could focus on were Kade’s tortured words as they fell off his lips. A sinner’s confession, Father Joe would have called it.

“Yes.” The finality in that one word made Angel shudder. “They would have tortured you and then dumped your corpse on my doorstep. That’s how they operate. Your safety came first. I couldn’t be selfish. I needed to protect you, and the only way to do it was to let you go. To make youwantto go. So, I went to the hospital and made you believe all those terrible things. I made you think I didn’t love you, that I didn’t care about the baby. That you meant nothing to me except as a means to an end. I lied, baby, but I lied to keep you safe.”

Angel didn’t know what to think. She’d spent the last six years hating him because she thought he used her to take down her brother. And now he was telling her he’d done all that to protect her. Was it true? Or was he playing some kind of game with her? But that didn’t make sense, either. None of this made sense.

“Why are you telling me all this now? Why not tell me when you found out Peter died? Why didn’t you look for me, Kade? I was alone, with no one.”

“As soon as Peter signed the paperwork and I talked to you, they shipped me out to Atlanta, where I finished my training. It was a six-week course. I didn’t know about Peter until I graduated. When I found out he’d been killed, I did go back to Miami to look for you, but you were gone. The house was empty. Jasmine swore she didn’t know where you were. I tried to find you, Angel, but a part of me was afraid Iwouldfind you. I knew you had to hate me even more than I feared. Peter’s death guaranteed it. I don’t know why he didn’t get on that plane. You were supposed to join him as soon as you could travel. A day or two, at most.”

“He came to see me. He told me we were going away, that it was going to be okay. We had each other’s backs. The reason he didn’t get on that plane had to be me.”

He’d risked his life to come see her, knowing what Kade had just done. Peter died because he thought she needed her big brother. He’d come alone. He must have given his protective detail the slip to check on her. She lowered her face into her hands just as the first sob broke free. Her brother was dead because of her.

“Don’t do that, Angel.” She felt Kade come up beside her. “Peter’s death wasn’t your fault.”

“But he came to see me instead of getting on the plane.”

“He loved you. He’d taken care of you since you were fourteen. I can understand him needing to make sure you were okay. It was his choice,moye serdtse. He knew the risks, and he chanced it because he loved you. Don’t blame yourself for Peter’s choices.”

“You still haven’t answered my question, Kade. Why are you telling me all of this now?”

Kade let out a breath and picked up his son’s sonogram picture, all he had left of him. He rarely even pulled it out anymore. “It was almost easy once I managed to learn how to forget. The pain stopped. The grief got buried. I survived. I lied to myself. Every day I woke up and repeated the same things over and over until I finally convinced myself I believed it. You didn’t matter. The baby didn’t matter. Peter didn’t matter. It was just a job. Nothing mattered. The past was the past. I drowned myself in whiskey, women, and work. Then there you were, spitting fire and ready to deck me. I couldn’t lie to myself anymore. I couldn’t hide from you or from what I’d done. You were the best and worst mistake of my life, Angel.”

“I was a mistake?”

The horror in her eyes made him reach out and take her hands. “I wasn’t supposed to get involved. I knew it was a mistake when I started it, but I couldn’t leave you alone. My handler threatened to pull me out because of how close we were getting. It would compromise the operation, he said. By that time, I knew you were pregnant, and I balked. You were the best thing to ever come along in my life. Leaving you, warranted or not, was the worst mistake of my life. It broke me, Angel, in ways I can’t even express.”

He hoped he was saying this right. He didn’t know how to express his feelings. He’d spent so much time burying them, it was hard to let them out.

“Why am I telling you all this now?” He squeezed her hands and tugged her closer, so there were only a few inches between them. “I’m telling you because I need you to understand why I did what I did. I only wanted to protect you because I loved you, Angel.”

“But what does any of it matter now?” she whispered, her tongue darting out to wet her lips.

“It matters,moye serdtse.” He leaned in until his forehead was pressed against hers. “It matters because I love you, and I need you to know the truth.”

“You love me?” Kade had no words for the emotions flickering in Angel’s eyes.

“I never wanted to leave you. I loved you then, and I love you now.”

Tears glittered in her eyes, and her words came out a whispered, broken mess. “What do you want from me?”

His heart twisted at the pain in her voice. He had put her through so much, and now he was going to ask so much more of her.

“It’s simple, Mrs. Kincaid. I wantyou.”

Angel stared, dumbfounded, into black eyes swirling with regret, pain, and warmth. Before she even had time to think, Kade leaned in, closing the small space between them, and kissed her.

The burn burst across her skin like a fire scorching along a gasoline-doused floor. It was intense, overwhelming, and she got lost in the sensation of his lips on hers. Her body craved this, ached for it, and she couldn’t see past the raw lust that consumed her. He deepened the kiss, and her arms went up and around his neck, her fingers twisting in his hair. Her mouth opened, relishing the feel of his tongue sweeping in, tangling with hers.

He tugged her, and she fell off the barstool, landing against him. His arms wrapped around her, pulling her in close. Her brain was screaming at her to stop this, but her body listened to that tiny voice that had been buried for so long. Some called it an inner goddess, but she just called it her nagging voice. It always nagged at her to give in to Kade. Right now, it was doing somersaults at the feel of his skin against hers.

The blare of music sounded from Kade’s pocket, and he pulled away, breathing hard. She took several deep breaths while he took out his phone. “It’s Bailey. I have to take this.”

She stared, confused and bewildered, when he set her on her feet and walked out of the room, the phone to his ear.

Her fingers touched her swollen lips, shocked.

What the hell just happened?

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