Page 16 of Rowan's Renewal
“Good morning, sweetheart,” I reply quietly, pressing a kiss to the top of his head.
He stiffens, his whole body tensing. I shush him as he attempts to pull away, but I don’t hold him against his will as he practically wrenches his hips backwards and rolls into the empty space behind him. His cheeks are bright red, and he grabs for the light blanket, covering his lower body.
“Try not to panic,” I murmur, “you’re safe here. It’s all okay.”
Rowan’s fingers tighten over the blanket clutched over his hips, his knuckles turning white. “I…I need…”
“A change, yeah,” I nod, carefully smoothing my hand over his bicep. He’s not the sleepy, relaxed, possibly regressed man I helped into the diaper last night, and I don’t want to spook him. But I’m not going to tiptoe around this, either. “I can take care of that, sweetheart.” He turns startled, wide eyes at me. I respond with an easy smile. “You told me last night that you want to try the Daddy thing, right? This is part of that. What’s your traffic light color?”
He cringes, hips moving under the blanket. I assume his protection is sodden and clammy by now. “Yellow.”
My hand continues to rub at his bicep. “Okay, let’s talk about what you’re feeling. What was last night like for you?”
Licking his lips, Rowan admits, “It was good. Weirdly relaxing.” The tiny smile he wears from his memories fades away and he squirms again. “But I was dry and clean from the shower last night. Now…”
“You’re wet from a deep sleep. That’s normal and expected.”
He scrunches his nose. “But…it’s gross.”
“Says who?”
“What?”
“Who says it’s gross? It’s just pee, Rowan. A quick wipe and you’ll be all fresh again.”
“But…” he flounders, then sighs. “Everyone else has always thought it was gross.”
“Yeah, well, I’m guessing none of your exes were Daddies. For me, this is normal, with or without a medical condition.”
He takes a moment to think about it, his fingers flexing and unflexing on the blanket’s hem. “You really don’t think it’s disgusting and weird?”
The vulnerability in his voice breaks my heart. I want to track down every single man who has made him feel like his condition makes him unlovable and cause them irreparable damage. How dare they hurt this beautiful, sweet man over something so harmless?
“Absolutely not.” Wanting to lighten the mood, I give him a crooked grin and wave a hand over the erection tenting the soft cotton of my sleep pants. “Case in point: I’m more into being your Daddy than I think you understand.”
His gaze drifts down my body and his cheeks flush pink again. “Really?”
“That’s more than just morning wood,” I confirm. “Ienjoyall of this, Ro.”
There’s a suspicious sheen of moisture in his eyes as he looks back at my face almost shyly. “I like that nickname,” he says. “Nobody’s ever given me one before. Well, okay, Bianca calls me Dumbass, but that’s not the same.”
I snort and hold my arms open. “C’mere. Come cuddle, then I’ll change you.”
He only hesitates for a moment before he shuffles back across the bed and into my arms. He fits well there, with his head tucked under my chin.
“Is this only for this week?” he asks tentatively, the words slightly muffled against my shoulder.
“Do you want it to be? Because I’ll be honest — Daddy/Boy relationships are more intimate to me. I usually get serious quickly. And because we live near each other back home, I can see us continuing and dating for real. But only if you want that. If you don’t, we can have fun this week, you can trial what it’s like to have a Daddy, and we can part ways as friends.”
“You, um, last night, you…you called yourself my Daddy…” My heart stumbles a little, and I worry that I took things too far, too fast. But then he continues, “I liked the sound of that. I haven’t had someone be mine in a long time.” He’s silent again for a moment, but I’m loath to push him, so I wait. Eventually, he starts again, “I…if this week goes well, I’d like to talk about how we can make it work back home, too. Because I haven’t been as relaxed with anyone as I was last night in…inever. I think…I think I need a Daddy. You. You as my Daddy.”
I squeeze him closer, excited by the potential in his words. “So…we call this week a trial run? Like a taster of all the things we can offer each other?”
He nods. “Yeah. Yeah, I’d like that.” Then he squirms and tentatively offers, “But, um, I think I need that change now…Daddy. Please.”
My heart squeezes again at the sweet, cautious trial of the title on his tongue. It sounds good to hear him say it. Right.
“Good boy for asking so nicely,” I tell him, nuzzling his head with my nose until I can pull back to look him in the eye. “Can I kiss you?”
