Page 106 of Take Hold of Me

Emilie

Nearly three weekshave passed since that awful fight with Wills and I am finishing up Fashion Week in London. Going through the motions. Standing for fittings, walking the catwalks, smiling for photos. Rinse and repeat. Last night, I went out to dinner with Lizzie and we talked about her “transition” out of full-time modeling into her fulfilling career as a furniture designer. And soon-to-be wife. Her parting words, “Modeling launched my career, but it does not define who I am—only I can do that,” hit home with me. And echoed the advice from the man who I have been trying desperately to keep out of my thoughts.

I think I am finally coming to realize who I am. And what I can do within the industry and for others. And for myself.

Today is the last of the shows. I have shoots in Germany and Belgium next, then I go to Barcelona for the movie premiere. While the hair stylist teases my hair, I catch the silhouette of a reed thin woman with long, straight blonde hair as she sits down in the chair next to me. I turn my head and realize I am finally meeting Geonna Broz.

Our eyes meet. Widen.

Blood zings through my veins.

Up close and without any makeup, she looks twelve, not eighteen. I exhale all the pent-up animosity and competition between us, my limbs unwinding into veritable mush. I extend my hand. “Geonna, it is a pleasure to meet you. I am Emilie.”

The young woman smiles so wide her eyelashes dance. I am transfixed by her innate beauty. “Oh, Emilie. I heard you were going to be here and hoped we would meet. I’ve been a fan of yours ever since I was a little girl. I became a model because you made it look so glamorous.”

I cannot help myself, I laugh. “Have you learned the truth yet?”

She winks. “It can be tedious, with all the travel. But I absolutely love it! I love the sets, the people, all the great things I get to experience.”

She reminds me of how I felt at the beginning. When it was all new and exciting. Instead of rekindling a passion within me, however, her zest for modeling makes me realize she deserves to be the fresh new face of the industry. Meeting her brings it home that it is time for me to pass the torch. Is this how Lizzie felt when we met all those years ago?

All of a sudden, I want to mentor her like Lizzie mentored me. We spend the rest of the day inseparable, even hugging each other on the catwalk when the show concludes.

Another two weekshave disappeared in a blur. Barcelona in early October is beautiful, the weather gorgeous. I wear my smile like armor, just like my Alexander McQueen dress and Jimmy Choo’s. As I transfer my Fendi wallet into my matching tote, it opens and my brand new California driver’s license falls out. Even though it does not bring me joy, it does offer a sense of freedom.

It was a miracle I was able to get the required fifty hours of driving time in, given my hectic modeling gigs. Preparing for and walking in London’s Fashion Week really stretched my driving instruction company’s time, but it all worked out in the end. Picking up the laminated card, I tuck it back into its slot.

And the Agency’s insistence on using a bodyguard to up my profile seems to have panned out as well. My new one, Ricky, is so quiet I hardly notice him. Not that I really look for him, anyway—bodyguards are no longer my style. But his presence, combined with my recent streak of appearances, has led me to beating out Geonna for a new contract. After meeting her in London, though, it feels like a victory with too high of a price tag. She is young and excited for her career to start, much like I was.

Before.

No, I cannot think abouthimagain.

To refocus my thoughts, I grab a lightweight jacket and leave my room. I told Rinaldo to meet me in the lobby to take me to tonight’s premiere or “our” movie. Finding a comfortable wingback chair tucked away from prying eyes in the hotel’s lobby, I escape into the world of Instagram. Read all of my followers’ comments, questions and respond to their new photos. This is what brings me happiness.

“There you are.” Rinaldo’s deep voice slides over my body like silk. He stands tall and proud, wearing a smart black suit and an open collared black button-down shirt. His Latin good looks are on full display, yet my pulse remains steady as we share a double-kiss greeting. Like everything else in my life sinceheleft, this meeting is strictly business.

“Emmie. Beautiful as ever. Looking forward to tonight?” After his eyes skim over my body, he takes my fall coat from my hands and holds it open for me.

Slipping my arms into the sleeves, I reply, “I am interested in seeing the completed movie,oui. How about you?”

He throws his head back and laughs. “I better watch closely as I doubt I’ll have another chance at acting. I think my odds of being able to kiss you again are better.”

Shaking my head, I place my hand into the crook of his arm. “I do not think I will choose to do another film either. However, I am looking forward to walking the red carpet as an actor in the movie instead of as someone else’s date.”

“I think it’s great you were able to come out to do the premiere here, with me. Football season is in full swing, and I couldn’t get back out to LA.”

With that, he escorts me past the other hotel guests to his black Ferrari waiting out front, and we take off. On the ride, we catch up about our families—avoiding the aftermath of the movie shoot—and I relax into the conversation. It is easy and lighthearted, and I do not have to worry about pressing any uncomfortable buttons that would activate some bad memories. I do not think Rinaldo is capable of having tortured thoughts. Or any thoughts beyond his own means to success.

After several turns, Rinaldo pulls up to the red carpet line. Paparazzi are lined up by the entrance. If this were Hollywood, we would have had a limo, but the captain of the Barcelona football team can drive himself anywhere he wants.

“So, where’s your bodyguard?”

I inhale, count to three and then exhale. “The Agency knew you would be escorting me to the premiere, so he is not with me for this leg of my trip. I will meet back up with him in LA.”

He nods and inches us forward to within one car length of the entrance. “I’m surprised Wills agreed to leave you alone with me.”

“It is not him.” I cannot bring myself to sayhisname. “I have a new bodyguard.”

---