Page 45 of Make Me Scream
I don’t think I canhurtthis Peris. Because I don’t think this Peris can hurt me.
It’s… it’sinsaneto think because he hurts me all the time with his cruel words and strong hands, but truly, maddeningly, hedoesn’t.Not more than I want or than I can handle. Because this is us, our fractured souls and dancing demons.
Our respite in the madness.
With a shaky sigh, I drop my clothes to the floor until I’m clad in nothing but my thin, black boxers. The chill of the airskitters over my skin, and I shiver, crossing my arms over my stomach and curling in on myself.
My bones stick out from my skin, even after weeks of eating daily—and healthily, at that. Years of malnutrition will leave me small for the rest of my life, I’m sure of that.
I huff a laugh. I’ll forever be a fucking twink.
But maybe it’s my own fault because tonight, I walked out there, looked at all the wonderful food Elise made, and I didn’t eat a bite of it. She piled my plate high with a smile to match, and I sat there, stewing in my own bullshit because Peris hurt me with his nasty little words, andI let him.And I ruined Thanksgiving dinner because of it.
Shaking the distress from my limbs, I reach for my pants on the floor and pull out my phone before crawling into bed. I yank the blanket up to my chin and curl onto my left side before pulling up my text thread with Peris, noticing a bunch of texts that have gone unseen and unanswered from earlier in the day.
Something akin to shame burns across my face as I skim the words, squirming as the warmth curls down my face and into my stomach, settling uncomfortably.
Peri boy:
Are you there?
How is it going?
Is she being a fucking bitch?
Do you need me to come get you?
Abel.
Answer your fucking phone.
I’m going to beat your ass, runt.
Jesus Christ, you’re pissing me off.
What is going on?!
Ok.
It’s that last one that makes my stomach sink to an uncomfortable depth—him just giving up.
Fuck.
I really am a piece of shit.
I don’t even realize I’m crying until a tear splashes across the screen, and I have to wipe it away and accidently hit the call button as I do so. I watch in horror as my face illuminates the screen as it rings, the sound echoing in the darkness of my room. And then, I see his face.
“What.” Not a question…but he answered.
“Uhh… hey.” Real fucking eloquent, Abel. Genius.
He sighs. “Why are you calling me when I’m in the next room, Abel?”
“Erm…” I wince. “I don’t know?” I drawl, posing it as a question. This makes Peris chuckle quickly, and I smile into the phone on a sniffle.
“All right.”
“I just read all your texts,” I say quietly.
